Marthakay's definitions

assholes anonymous

Assholes Anonymous or AA – A 12-step program for assholes in an attempt to recover from its horrible sphincter grip into recovery. An asshole can never be cured but they can be “in recovery.”

Some never come to grips with their situation until they have suffered an assectomy

The 12 Steps of Assholes Anonymous
1. We admitted we were powerless over our assholiness - that our lives had become unmanageable
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to non-asshole living.
3. Made a decision to turn our asshole desires and asshole habits over to the care of God as we understood God
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our own personal asshole.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our being an asshole.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of being an asshole.
7. Humbly asked God to remove our assholes.
8. Made a list of all persons the asshole in us had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or other assholes
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were being an asshole, promptly admitted it
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood God, praying only for knowledge of God's will to free us from our assholes and the power to carry that out
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other assholes, and to practice these principles in all our affairs

From an AA (Assholes Anonymous) meeting:

Mike: "My name is Mike and I am an asshole. I was born an asshole and have been an asshole, sometimes in denial all of my life."

Group: "Hi, Mike!"

by Marthakay November 9, 2008

Kroger

(Noun) A quantity or amount of goods, irregardless of weight, that may be contained in a plastic grocery sack. Heard in the Upper South in Dayton, Ohio when a person is recycling the grocery bag to use for another purpose. These bags may or not come from an actual Kroger store.

This term may be used in other areas such as Cincinnati, Lexington, Louisville and Bowling Green Kentucky where the Kroger supermarket chain prevails.

"I'm offering a Kroger of kitchen gadgets and knick-knacks to the first person who emails me back with their phone number on Freecycle."

This is similar to two actual Freecycle offers posted in late March, 2007 on Freecycle Dayton.

by Marthakay March 31, 2007

Snopesed

Snopesed (verb), Snopsing (noun) refers to the act of questioning the origin of an email forwarded to one's inbox. There are certain red flags leading to the recipient initiating a Snopsing. Some are the words "Send this to everyone you know!" the attribution of clever statements or shibboleths to well known people or celebrities, often Kurt Vonnegut or George Carlin and dire warnings and predictions to cause alarm and fear in soft-hearted or gullible folk. The recipient then plugs keywords from the forward into www.snopes.com to reveal basic fallacies and/or half-truths inherent in the message.

My husband forwarded me "George Carlin's Rules for 2007," but I Snopesed it and found out it wasn't from 2006 and it was really coined by Bill Mahler.

My cousin sent me an email suggesting I visit a particular website where every hit will supposedly cause Bill Gates to contribute a dollar to the the Society for Six-toed Sephardic Semites or some other worthy cause, but a Snopsing revealed it to be totally false.

by Marthakay January 5, 2009

vulgarnym

(noun) A vulgarnym is a word some coarse and common people use instead of the "nice" word. Nice southern ladies do not use vulgarnyms.

Vulgarism/nice word
pee/tee tee
pussy/tee-hiny
shit/BM
fuck/make whoopie

"I knew she was not a person of quality at the DAR luncheon when she said she had to pee instead of saying tee tee," said Amanda Sue Dautrive, who knew a vulgarnym when she heard one.

by Marthakay December 9, 2008

Political Pyromaniac

A person who gets a thrill out of setting people up against each other, especially in online bulletin boards and often regarding people and issues in their locality. The Political Pyromaniac may take a posting or email message and forward or copy it to another person, knowing that it will cause a virulent reaction. The PP essentially likes to set fires and stand back and watch the ensuing fireworks or explosion. They are also the peeping Toms of the Internet and closet drama kings and queens.

Charles, a known Political Pyromaniac, received a group email post. Tina said a website owned by a man named Jim was "an amusing little supposedly non-political site." Charles forwarded the message to Jim. Jim then sent an anti-Tina email to everyone on the group and copied it to her bosses, trying to get her fired. He pointed out that Tina's husband was "a city police officer," which was not relevant to anyone receiving the message. The recipients didn't really know Jim or why he was so upset or what he was getting at. They responded in Tina's defense. Charles sat back and watched the action and then quietly unsubscribed from the email group.

by Marthakay May 2, 2008

cou rouge

Cou rouge is "redneck" in French. It refers to Cajuns, Louisiana descendants of French peasants. It is a euphemism in the same spirit of calling the mildly upscale discount retailer "Tar-ghay" instead of "Target." It is also the dignified opposite of the controversial coonass or coon-ass.

T-Ben told me it was too cou rouge to put a a statue of Our Lady of the Butane Tank over to the Bayou side of the house, but cher, the Good Lady will be pleased.

by Marthakay April 25, 2008

Bitchity boppity boo

Inspired by the classic Disney animated feature, Cinderella, Bitchity boppity boo is a typically feminine response to catty behavior or outrageous behavior. It's upbeat with an edge, and counters the snarl behind the statement with a little more of that "Little Miss Merry Sunshine is about ready to hack you with a machete" feel than perhaps wrawl! or meow.

Clarissa: Oh, that outfit really is you! Did you get it at Dollar General? No, wait - it looks like a real original. I bet you got it at Goodwill!

Desdemona: Oh, how did you guess? Bitchity boppity boo!

by Marthakay May 24, 2007