Markwonder's definitions
While visiting Kopp's frozen custard shop in Milwaukee where smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin was on duty, Vice President Joe Biden was sampling some of the tasty treats.
Biden: "What do I owe you for the delicious custard?"
Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: “Don’t worry, it’s on the house. … Lower our taxes and we’ll call it even.”
Biden: “Why don’t you say something nice instead of being a Smart–ass all the time?”
Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: (Thinking) This motherfucker just lost my vote.
Biden: "What do I owe you for the delicious custard?"
Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: “Don’t worry, it’s on the house. … Lower our taxes and we’ll call it even.”
Biden: “Why don’t you say something nice instead of being a Smart–ass all the time?”
Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: (Thinking) This motherfucker just lost my vote.
by markwonder August 30, 2010
Get the Smart-ass mug.1. An award now given out frivolously.
2. An award given to President Barack Obama based on his first 17 days in office. The nomination deadline for the prize was 17 days after he took office.
3. An award given the President Barack Obama on the basis of the "hope" he inspires and what he "might" do while President.
2. An award given to President Barack Obama based on his first 17 days in office. The nomination deadline for the prize was 17 days after he took office.
3. An award given the President Barack Obama on the basis of the "hope" he inspires and what he "might" do while President.
by Markwonder October 9, 2009
Get the Nobel Peace Prize mug.Small, sugary jelly-like candy. They are shaped like small beans and come in many flavors and colors. They are somewhat harder than gummy bears. They are also very popular with the children around Easter.
by Markwonder November 15, 2010
Get the Jellybeans mug.The law of wrong way states that: "While driving in the city, any missed or wrong turn and subsequent backtracking to find your original route will be met by frustratingly slow moving traffic and red lights at every intersection.
Many, if not all of these red lights will be Full-cycle red lights."
Many, if not all of these red lights will be Full-cycle red lights."
While trying to find the corporate building downtown, I missed my turn and ended up backtracking an extra 3 miles, through 4 busy intersections, while following two old ladies, a Vespa scooter and a garbage truck. The law of wrong way was in effect.
Needless to say, I missed the Boss's luncheon and didn't get the promotion. FML.
Needless to say, I missed the Boss's luncheon and didn't get the promotion. FML.
by Markwonder October 28, 2010
Get the Law of wrong way mug.Would you rather have a threesome with your parents and nobody find out?
OR
Not have a threesome with your parents and have everybody think you did?
OR
Not have a threesome with your parents and have everybody think you did?
by markwonder November 19, 2010
Get the Would you rather mug.A hypocrite is someone who is critical of a certain practice when they themselves are engaging in the very same practice.
Anyone who supports illegal immigration in Arizona yet maintains locks on the doors of their homes and businesses to keep people from just walking in and taking anything they may need to make a better life for themselves or their families is a hipocrite.
by markwonder May 7, 2010
Get the hipocrite mug.The point at which the friendship with your sweetheart ends and becomes a business relationship.
The point at which you stop having fun and take on responsibility for yourself and your new wife.
The end of your life as you once knew it.
The point at which you stop having fun and take on responsibility for yourself and your new wife.
The end of your life as you once knew it.
Marriage is a lot like playing cards.
You start out giving a heart and a diamond, and end up wishing for a club and a spade.
You start out giving a heart and a diamond, and end up wishing for a club and a spade.
by Markwonder January 11, 2011
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