21 definitions by markwonder

Top Definition
There are two types of flash mobs:

Caucasian flash mob - Mainly Caucasians and a few Asians who come together to unexpectedly entertain or confuse an existing crowd of people. Features some light-hearted performance or a surprise random form of entertainment.

African flash mob - Mainly Africans and a few hispanics who come together to unexpectedly rob or vandalize a business establishment. Features the surprise theft or destruction of the business owner's property and/or inventory.
1. Christie and Lynn were sopranos in the large chorus flash mob that unexpectedly broke into "Silent Night" for the crowd at the mall courtyard during Christmas Eve last year.

2. Shaqueefa and Lashawnda each stole over $400 in candy, beef jerky and menthol cigarettes and smashed windows and displays as part of the large flash mob that overwhelmed the Qwiktrip last week causing untold damage to the store and injury to the owner.
by Markwonder August 19, 2011
1. To be cheap, have restraint or use with moderation. Has nothing to do with the racial slur, nigger.
a) Because Katie and Mike were saving to buy a house, their weekly food budget was "niggardly" spent at the grocery store.

b) Kashonda spent her entire welfare check on hair extensions, a dime of crack, a manicure and 48 packages of ramen noodles for her 3 children. It could be said that her welfare check was spent "niggerly".
by markwonder June 21, 2009
1. An award now given out frivolously.
2. An award given to President Barack Obama based on his first 17 days in office. The nomination deadline for the prize was 17 days after he took office.
3. An award given the President Barack Obama on the basis of the "hope" he inspires and what he "might" do while President.
The Nobel Peace Prize is yet another attempt to apologize for slavery.
by Markwonder October 09, 2009
The point at which the friendship with your sweetheart ends and becomes a business relationship.

The point at which you stop having fun and take on responsibility for yourself and your new wife.

The end of your life as you once knew it.
Marriage is a lot like playing cards.

You start out giving a heart and a diamond, and end up wishing for a club and a spade.
by Markwonder January 10, 2011
A game where you are given a choice between two embarassing scenarios and you have to choose one.
Would you rather have a threesome with your parents and nobody find out?

OR

Not have a threesome with your parents and have everybody think you did?
by markwonder November 16, 2010
What Joe Biden thinks you are if you ask him to lower the U.S. citizens' tax burden.
While visiting Kopp's frozen custard shop in Milwaukee where smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin was on duty, Vice President Joe Biden was sampling some of the tasty treats.

Biden: "What do I owe you for the delicious custard?"

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: “Don’t worry, it’s on the house. … Lower our taxes and we’ll call it even.”

Biden: “Why don’t you say something nice instead of being a Smart–ass all the time?”

Smart-ass Custard Shop Manager Scott Borkin: (Thinking) This motherfucker just lost my vote.
by markwonder August 30, 2010
Usually practiced by those on the left of the political spectrum when they are confronted with an opinion or belief that is different than theirs.
During the Miss America Pageant, When asked by judge Perez Hilton, an openly gay gossip blogger, whether she believed in gay marriage, Miss California, Carrie Prejean, said "We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite. And you know what, I think in my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised."
Carrie Prejean was sneered and booed at by the audience and confronted with such abject hate and intolerance by the audience and many liberals for her opinion that many of the gay men at the event
wondered aloud why the judges did not discriminate against her for her beliefs. The question came up as to why Carrie Prejean was not thrown out of the competition for her stand on gay marriage.
by markwonder April 20, 2009

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