5 definitions by Magic Jesus

The fake company invented by the writers of MAD tv to represent and parody those cheap infomercials and paid programming programmes you see on TV way late at night/really early in the morning that try to pass off unrealisticly cheap and unreliable products as good, safe, and quality products that are just too good to be in stores

Spishak commercials usually have:

-A repetitive jingle that cues once the Spishak guy appears
-Someone seriously maimed and bloodied up at the end
-Bad acting and saying things that make no sense
-A couple worried about an issue irrelevant to the commercial
-Pat Kilbane (or whoever the Spishak Guy is in the sketch) jumps out of nowhere claiming he can fix their problems
-The married couple claims "Spishak Man has saved our marriage!"

Spishak has created a plethora of stupid products, including:

Spishak Snoorpk
Spishak Mach 20 Razor
Spishak Hey It's Ovens For Kids Easy Bake Oven
Spishak Excuses Excuses Excuses Excuses '98
Spishak Bug Zapper Only The Bugs Are Deers Instead
Spishak Announcer: Has this ever happened to you?
David Herman as "Troubled Man": (Throws water on car) AHHh!
Spishak Announcer: No need to worry with new Spishwax carwax from Spishak! Spishwax is based on a highly scientific principal. Too difficult to understand but easy to a apply!
Troubled Man: (Throws water on car)
Spishak Announcer: See how the water beads? That's Spishawax protecting your car from water damage! Unforutnately Spishwax won't protect your car from:

Paint, Tar, Feathers, Guano, Shampoo, Conditioner, Wood Stain, Mahogany Wood Stain (Troubled Man just throws a can of wood stain at the car really hard), Eggs, Scrambled Eggs, Easter Eggs, Easter Rocks, Baseball Bats, Bowling Balls, Chum, Potted Plants, Jewish Weddings, Cat Litter, Neighborhood Kids, Chicken and Dumplings, Christmas Decorations, Cinder Blocks, Sledgwhammers, Sandwiches, Did we mention Baseball Bats?, Boat Anchors, And Wrecking Balls!

Spishak Announcer: So when you think of carwax...
Troubled Man: ...Spishak Spishwax from Spishak! The catalog says-
Angry Car Owner: HEY!!! WHAT’D YOU DO TO MY CAR!? HEY!!! (Chases Troubled Man)
Spishak Announcer: Spishak Spishwax, Remember: "It's just wax."
by Magic Jesus July 11, 2008
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Music rappers call "hip hop" when it sounds like pop music (intoxicating beats to lyircs nobody actually listens to)

This can mean a beat that sounds like Britney Spears or a pussy/money song with a nice beat but doesn't use more than 50 different words.

Some Hip Pop artists are:

Soulja Boy
T-Pain
Yin Yang Twins
Lil' Wayne
VIC
Flo Rida
Foxx and Webbie
Timbaland
Hip Pop Fan: Did you hear that new Yin Yang Twins song, 'Drop'? It's so mothafuckin raw!

Hip Hop Fan: Yeah, the beat sounded just like 'FeedBack', by world-famous pop music star Janet Jackson, who's been making pop music for the past 2 decades, so I turned it off. What's it about, anyway?

Hip Pop Fan:.......
by Magic Jesus November 16, 2008
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An African American man that got shot at 50 times the night before his wedding in the New York City borough of Queens on November 25, 2006 by 5 undercover NYPD officers who

The case referring to the former
From Wikipedia

"...One of Sean Bell's friends was heard to say, "Yo, get my gun" as they left the scene. Fearing a shooting might occur, the detective followed the men to their car while alerting his backup team, prompting the team to confront Bell and his companions before they could leave the scene."

"...In an interview on Larry King Live, accompanying Bell's former fiancée Nicole Paultre, Al Sharpton stated that according to his conversations with eyewitnesses, none of the three men who were shot mentioned a gun while leaving the club."
by Magic Jesus June 11, 2008
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-Recklessly destructive/painful endeavors recorded JUST to put on YouTube

-Anything so ridiculously irresponsible, it needs to be recorded and uploaded onto YouTube ASAP
Rob: Yo Niel...why the hell are your pants bleeding?
Niel: (forcing a laugh)I put some peanut butter on my dick, got hard, and stuck it down a rabbit hole.
Rob: Why would you do something to YouTube Retarded?
Tom: (holding a cmaera) To put it on YouTube, duh...

Rob: Damn, that's the 3rd YouTube Retarded thing I've seen today...what's up with people?
Aryss: Sucky Sucky 5 dolla?
Rob: Aryss!? What the fuck are you doin' on the damn street corner? Aren't you supposed to be in class?
Aryss: Yeah, but I need more cash.
Rob: Why? I thought you had just enough money to get you through law school?
Aryss: I had more than enough, but I wanna become a Scientologist. That way, when I reach OT3, I can communicate with my Thetan and he together, we can overcome any "law" Xenu has laid before us!
Rob: Times like this make me wish I had a camera. I think they're hard enough to smack the sense back into yo' ass
by Magic Jesus May 30, 2008
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Tupac Shakur's alternate alias that was used to release much of his unlreleased works, such as 'Thug Nigga', after his death.
"...scrambled the word 'Makaveli and read 'Am Alive'..."

-Papoose on 'Street Credibility'
by Magic Jesus May 31, 2008
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