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8 definitions by Kristov

 
1.
a porker is a female that says she is going to stop eating and brags about how much she goes to the gym to her other fat or ugly friends, but in truth she goes home every day, sits on the couch, watches soap operas, eats all the african kids food, and suffocates one of her many cats. she then repetively asks others if her clothes make her look fat. a porker has no real social life, and she is often unintelligent because she let herself become such a porker.

a man can never be called a porker, only a female.
porker: hey, do these jeans make me look fat?

(What an average bystander says): oh, not at all. just don't touch my poutine.

(What they should have said): bitch git on dat treadmill. i want to boil fries in your sweat you porkin bitch!
by kristov June 19, 2006
 
2.
a youth between the ages 10 and 12. has no taste in music or fashion other than the things he or she sees on popular television. pre pubescent little fucks that have voices that crack and undeveloped cleavage.

some guy: oh well then billy, why don't you tell me why you like chris brown so much?

pre-teen: definitely the lyrics.
by kristov June 19, 2006
 
3.
basically, past tense for re-creating a move from the movie Ong Bak:The Thai Warrior, and using it on an ordinary civilian, usually an emo kid. some of the best include the knee and elbows to the head, and the kick to the face. watch the movie and mix and match your own combinations, then find some emo kids to test it on. they're as passive as hindu cows, until they actually get hurt. then they're like rabbits that had just been shot in the abdomen. FUN ENSUES!
Guy 1: Dude look, some little emos are crossing the street!

Guy 2: HEY THATS J-WALKING!

Guy 1: Get em legs!

*Guy 2 Ong Bak's the emo kids*

Emo kids: *either unconscious or squealing*

Guy 2 Standing over the incapacitated emo kids: Ya'll just got Ong Bak'd!

Guy 1: word
by kristov June 19, 2006
 
4.
A term from certain areas of Liverpool meaning for something to go wrong, mess something up or to fall over.
Ah shit I've gone west!!
by Kristov February 23, 2005
 
5.
In essence, a misconstrued dialect in which oriental people greet each other. Stemming from the english word, "today", chueday has multiple meanings in the colloquial english-as-a-second-language AZN's tongue. "Chueday" can be used in accurate english context(rarely), but is more often misused as a greeting amongst the stereotypically AZN asians we all have come to love and hate. Certain AZNS will use "chueday" as, "hello", or "how are you?", or even, "Newtons first law of motion is sometimes referred to as the law of intertia".
Now you would have to ask yourself, how would they know which one is which? Well, depending on how certain syllables are stressed in the word, and the kind of tone it is said in, it is easy to decipher. See Below.

azn 1: chueday (regular tone: how are you guys?)
azn 2: CHUDAY!!! (excited tone, stressed "U":I had awkward azn sex last night)
azn 3: chooday... (double o, somewhat ashamed tone: With me!)
azn 1: chueday? (regular tone, question: Did you use a rubber glove?)

azn: CHUEDAY ist chune nineteenf, and i am wearning to wriate dah engarish, and haow choo grammaar dah engarish, vary goods.
by kristov June 16, 2006
 
6.
hip hop word for dong
mc 1: yo man me ill papa been givin me trouble all day, my undies be pinchin it!

mc 2: dat is not nearly as bad asme, i got da itchy scrot!
by kristov December 11, 2006
 
7.
emo. just plain fucking emo.

majority of the crowd are fat emo girls with no friends and anorexic little boys wearing their little sisters jeans and la senza girl tops.

anything promoting this, in other words, dashboard confessional, nees to be kicked in the throat. and maybe sent to that planet in star wars with all the furry people so they could be eaten alive. fucking kids wouldnt survive for 3 minutes in the wilderness.

has anyone ever tried Ong-Bak'ing an emo? try it, they fall like a sack of raisins. its hilarious.
dashboard confessional emo: i promis you, from teh bottom heart, i will love yuo till death, till us part! i prome yuo as a lover and a freinnd, i will lovve you!

dashboard emo fan: omg <3
by kristov June 19, 2006