40 definitions by Jeffrey Douglas

The key to a cold, refreshing and delicious paradise.
The worst thing to forget when going camping.
One lads night out in a tent...
Jake: "Finally, now where's that bottle opener!?"
Bill: "<Rummage> OH SHIT!"
Jake: "You wonky bollocks bastard!"
by Jeffrey Douglas December 04, 2006

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A powerful awesome tackle in rugby that will seriously hurt your opponent and make him think twice before trying to run past you with the ball again!
Iain Roberts: "And it's Lottie Tuqiri breaking down the right, and ... ouch.... ooh... a BIG HIT from Sean Lamont! He won't be getting up from that. Look at that dent in the turf now! Oh, what a mess."
by Jeffrey Douglas November 25, 2006

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1. term used by commentators to describe a footballers sometimes hilarious miss.

2. term used by friends to mock a male who has failed to shag the town bike
John Motson: "Rooney, Giggs and Ronaldo, now surely, Ye - Oh - no! miss of the season. Piss poor shot from Ronaldo

Kev: "As if you didn't bang Sally, she is soo easy!"
Gav: "Yea but i forgot my rhohypnol"
Kev: "Oh, mate, miss of the season!"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 18, 2006

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a place in football where you are classed as a sinner, and any goal you score from an offside position will be ignored by everybody who is onside.

A place in Rugby where it is easier to hurt/maim/tackle/cheat your opposition, and easier to play the whole game. Usually being offside in rugby will end up in a penalty to your opposition. Bastards.
Mrs. McGrath: "Billy! You're offside! Get back!"
Billy: "FUCK YOU MUM!"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 25, 2006

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adj. meaning agile. Nimble people are often thin and frail. Piano players are nimble, weak and frail. They would be no longer nimble if their fingers were cut off, so perhaps being nimble isnt all its cracked up to be
E.g. Jason Robinson

Frank: "Woe, woo, oh, the way he prances along is so nimble! so gracious! so elegant"
Baz: "But he is weak and frail. What good is there in being nimble, when you can't lift a car??"
by Jeffrey Douglas November 05, 2006

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Doing a dad is an act that is hilarious to those all around you but their laughter only drives you into the downward spiral known as doing a dad. Doing a dad shoots your emotive side into overdrive warp speed. It can start off small, but the tears keep coming until all that is left of someone doing a dad is a blithering mound of tears sniffles and soiled handkerchiefs. All it takes is a few jokes at the person's expense like prodding their man-breasts and saying "Gor blimey, they're like titties them, tubbs", then the water works come on much to the amusement of the audience.

The phrase comes from a real person, with real emotional displays, who regulary did a dad. Do a dad is now a common phrase all over the world, usually preceeded by don't.
Chris: "Waddle waddle! Ha! Bill, you walk like a penguin!"
Bill: "MMnnn. Boo hoo! <cry cry cry>"
Tom: "Oh god, don't cry about it!"
Chris: "Oh! C'mon don't do a dad."
by Jeffrey Douglas September 03, 2006

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Arguably one of the better NASA fields of expertise. When the space race was on and it was Uncle Sam vs U.S.S.R, Astronaut vs Cosmonaut and Cats vs Dogs, the need for unicycle wheelchairs became apparant, and Mr. Nasa was once quoted saying, after they had been developed, "i don't know how we ever got by without them"

The Unicycle wheelchair was brought into the commercial sector at the very second the bee gees popularised close harmonic singing in tight trousers. Although, like toasters, expensive at first, the next christmas every household had one. The ratio in Belgium at the time of Michael Moore's conception was 12 unicycle wheelchairs to every 5 people with cheshire cats.

Through these developing years, people began to tamper with NASA's creation. Gentleman would "PIMP" or "ICE" their "RIDES" by adding "HARDCORE" propulsion systems and a "SICK" paint job. Ladies were not so intent on being the flyest mutha so were content with fluffy dice and a sombrero.

Today they are popular still, especially around buckingham palace.
"Unicycle Wheelchairs are essential for respiration"

"Is it a bird?"
"Is it a plane?"
"No, by Jove, its a unicycle wheelchair"
by Jeffrey Douglas August 12, 2006

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