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4 definitions by DeskFlyer

 
1.
You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public buys your bull.
Normal guy: "Dude, your company just took a crap but you just bought that mansion! How'd you do it?"

Douchebag CEO: "Capitalism."
by DeskFlyer August 21, 2009
459 214
 
2.
Living proof that human evolution has yet to progress to the point where the female's genes have been reprogrammed to finally ignore the primitive and obsolete alpha male and expand their sexual relations to the more intelligent and advanced beta male. This is why 21st century women are still compelled to be sexually attracted to aggressive assholes who treat them like crap instead of reserved guys who treat them with dignity and respect, e.g. nice guys. As a result, nice guys are normally single because women are naturally repelled by them.
Women like nice guys, but won't date them.
by DeskFlyer August 24, 2007
354 230
 
3.
An act commonly seen on dance floors around the world.
OMG Jim was totally dry humping Nicki at prom!
by DeskFlyer September 05, 2008
761 636
 
4.
A social networking website where new parents go to show off photos of their new sex trophies. Rarely used as a form of direct communication. Over-saturated with lame applications that are impossible to block due to new ones being released every 30 seconds or so. Constantly nags users to add as many friends as possible, even though the recommended additions are usually complete strangers. Features chat system which rarely works. Retains 100% of users' information and photos even after the deletion of their account, mainly because it has been permanently archived on a server inside the CIA's headquarters for future analysis.
Hey look another picture of Jen's kid on Facebook. :yawn:
by DeskFlyer December 19, 2009
63 10