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DesPERRYado's definitions

spankerchief

An ejaculatory device used to aid in the collection or removal of ejaculate.
Person: "My mom found my spankerchief."
Luke: "hahaha, you have a spankerchief?"
by DesPERRYado September 5, 2005
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wrongly accused of harassment

A phrase you adlib into a song after being wrong accused of harassment.
Maybe the dark is from your eyes. Maybe the dark is from being wrong accused of harassment.

After 9 days, I let the horse run free because I was wrongly accused of harassment.
by DesPERRYado November 4, 2004
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Growlanser

Someone who saves the world from unparalleled danger; a hero. Also known as a Savior of the Light.
Billy saved my ass from jail, he's a Growlanser.
by DesPERRYado January 18, 2005
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sock

1. A garment usually worn between your foot and footwear which is meant to facilitate optimum body temperature, maximize comfort and decrease disgusting foot odor. Generally comes in pairs.

2. A disposable ejaculatory device used by lonely, socially inept young men who do not like to masturbate in the shower or ejaculate all over furniture.
1. "Man, these new socks are really helping me maintain optimal, maximize comfort and minimize disgusting foot odor. And look, I have one for each foot."

2. "John, where have all your socks gone? I could've sworn that I bought you a pack just last week."
by desperryado October 3, 2005
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digicide

The intention, systematic killing of digital pets. Done so via abusing digital pets, overfeeding them, or by simply resetting the handheld ones.
23:10 perragorn: This Mark Fagan kid let me play with his for a few minutes and i fed it like 90 meals in 4 minutes so it died
23:11 perragorn: and he was like "awwwww my friend was going to give me 10 dollars if I raised it the right way."
23:11 Nathan: lol
23:11 Nathan: hahahahahaa
23:11 Nathan: hahahaha
23:11 Nathan: ahahahahha
23:11 Nathan: ahahahaha
23:11 Nathan: ahah
23:11 Nathan: ah
23:11 Nathan: ahaha
23:11 Nathan: ha
23:11 perragorn: Like that?
23:11 Nathan: digicide!!!
by desPERRYado April 29, 2006
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nice guy

A young male who will give up countless hours of his time listening to the problems of his very attractive female friends because they need someone to talk to about their apathetic, Baywatch jock of a boyfriend because no one else will listen or genuinely care. Although always surrounded by beautiful girls the nice guy can’t get a girlfriend or even facilitate the alleviation of certain “drives” because his “ordinary” physical appearance will forever be compared to the Baywatch beach bum’s. The nice guy would never capitalize on a vulnerable girl, objectify or cheat on a girl, he will go out of his way and bend over backwards to help his “friends” and will never ask for anything in return but no matter how intelligent, understanding, humorous, compassionate, trusting or loyal the nice guy is the female cohort will always pass him up and endure any length of abuse, objectification, apathy and cold-heartedness from a man if he has physical attractiveness, fashion, big muscles and chiseled facial features.

The nice guy will eventually realize that his dependability and empathy will never be appreciated and all his friendships with females are all one-sided. This coupled with years of watching girls go for tanned, muscular jerk-offs with nice cars while he desperately hopes someone will realize that how viable he actually is will spawn and incubate the nice guy’s insecurities and he will eventually abandon his views, dumb-down his speech, take-up weight-lifting and switch majors from cancer research with a minor in theoretical physics to playground management so he can devote his time to emulating Baywatch characters and football players so that he will one day be viewed as more than a “nice guy.”

The nice guy will eventually work up the courage to ask out his attractive female friend but will invariably be turned down because she’s so self-centered that she’d never actually had a smidgeon of compassion for the nice guy’s feelings or even realized that he’s interested in girls. After rejecting the nice guy, the girl will downplay the supposed friendship to the point where they never speak again, which in turn will make the nice guy depressed (ironically, he won’t have anyone to talk to) because he’s devoted so much time and energy and has become so warped from being exposed to these kinds of people that he will either live the rest of his life alone in a tiny apartment, jerking off to old Saved by the Bell episodes or get drunk one night and impregnate a 300-pound, cross-eyed derelict who works at Wendy’s and spend the rest of his life being treated like shit.

The whole ‘nice guy’ phenomenon really supports the idea that people primarily care about physical appearances and that shrewdness, selfishness and narcissism will always triumph over compassion, rapport and “inner beauty.”
"Jeez Patrick, I hope I can find a nice guy like you someday."

"Well, if you need me I'll be at home, crying myself to sleep while masturbating to the sound of my 70-year-old neighbors having sex...I might also play some ps2."
by desperryado October 3, 2005
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angst

Something I had a lot of when published most of my other UD entries.
"I had a lot of angst and angry when I published those definitions of teen parent, religion and nice guy, and now I feel bad because I can't delete any of them."
by desPERRYado January 1, 2007
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