23 definitions by Darker
In the annuals of recorded history known as the Facebook news-feed one will typically notice several girls on you friend list using the "status update" feature to bitch about their lives. All women tend to complain, but in a case of specific fat chick aggression syndrome the complaints will have a typically "sharp edge", and will go beyond any of the normal bounds of conversation. For example, a normal case of female bullshit could involve a young gentleman or a failed exam, but unique to fat chick aggression is the consistent update of mental, social, and physical failure along with an implicit request for support. True sufferers should fire off one of these posts at least twice weekly.
These are examples of Facebook status updates where the term "Fat Chick Aggression" could be a good descriptor.
Amanda : My friend said that if your going to jump off a bridge set yourself on fire so we can all see it. I'm jumping off my bridge.
Shiloh : My dad once told me I failed to live up to his expectations.
Amber : My parents called me today. I don't think they understand ....
Kate : I can't believe how shitty life is. I just watched "The View", and there was someone on there basically saying that people with manic depression should just "suck it up". After watching the other lady on there I think I'm bipolar too. That guy was such a jerk!!!
Amanda : My friend said that if your going to jump off a bridge set yourself on fire so we can all see it. I'm jumping off my bridge.
Shiloh : My dad once told me I failed to live up to his expectations.
Amber : My parents called me today. I don't think they understand ....
Kate : I can't believe how shitty life is. I just watched "The View", and there was someone on there basically saying that people with manic depression should just "suck it up". After watching the other lady on there I think I'm bipolar too. That guy was such a jerk!!!
by Darker May 16, 2011
A descriptive term used by men to complement the posterior of an attractive female. The term was coined due to the relative similarities observed between the capital letter "A" and the angular proportions of certain females posterior regions.
AJ : Check it out. Chick in the blue jeans has a nice fucking A-frame.
CJ : A- frame??? I'd really like to know how you thought up that term and what the fuck it has to do with girls backside.
AJ : It's easy. Look up one pant leg to the crotch move your eyes over that area then run your eyes down the other leg.
CJ : Fuckin' A. Good call.
CJ : A- frame??? I'd really like to know how you thought up that term and what the fuck it has to do with girls backside.
AJ : It's easy. Look up one pant leg to the crotch move your eyes over that area then run your eyes down the other leg.
CJ : Fuckin' A. Good call.
by Darker May 8, 2010
A reference to the television show "Torchwood", a "Captain Jack" refers to a problem solving technique in which a party seduces every person between themselves and their goal.
Captain Jack Harkness: "The last time I was sentenced to death, I ordered four hyper-vodkas for my breakfast. All a bit of a blur after that... I woke up in bed with both of my executioners. Lovely couple, they stayed in touch! Can't say that about most executioners."
Captain Jack Harkness: "The last time I was sentenced to death, I ordered four hyper-vodkas for my breakfast. All a bit of a blur after that... I woke up in bed with both of my executioners. Lovely couple, they stayed in touch! Can't say that about most executioners."
Lucy : I can't believe I blew my professor and only got a "B".
Darcy : Well you know he doesn't even submit the grades. It's the teaching assistant that does that, and you should probably should also have fucked the anorexic guy that sends out the reports if you really cared about your grade.
Lucy : Hey, I don't think I could stand going full "Captain Jack" just for a good E-Sci grade. It's not like it was a core class. Besides, my TA was girl and she wasn't pretty.
Darcy : Sometimes you gotta take one for team Lucy.
Lucy : True that. My main skill is that I'm a massive slut.
Darcy : Well you know he doesn't even submit the grades. It's the teaching assistant that does that, and you should probably should also have fucked the anorexic guy that sends out the reports if you really cared about your grade.
Lucy : Hey, I don't think I could stand going full "Captain Jack" just for a good E-Sci grade. It's not like it was a core class. Besides, my TA was girl and she wasn't pretty.
Darcy : Sometimes you gotta take one for team Lucy.
Lucy : True that. My main skill is that I'm a massive slut.
by Darker August 4, 2011
An act of self-pleasure intended purely for the function of dealing with cronic stress. In many cases; this form of masturbation is grossly satirized with descriptions of men grinding their teeth, audibly growling, and exhibiting a pulsating forehead vein.
Larry : Dude writing my thesis fucking sucks. I'm going to fucking kill myself.
Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.
Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.
Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?
Larry : Furious masturbation?
Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.
Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.
Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.
Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.
Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?
Larry : Furious masturbation?
Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.
Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.
by Darker January 21, 2010
Johnny Deeper is a fictional young boy who appears in a number of sexually explicit anecdotes referred to as "Johnny Deeper Jokes". These stories are passed around elementary school age males, and may to many represent first exposure to sexually themed humor.
Most stories center around the character Johnny Deeper fornicating with teachers or being vulgar in the classroom; hence the series enduring popularity with the age group. Some jokes are very simple and play only off Johnny's surname, while others, far more complex, just represent Johnny as a vulgar, but ultimately innocent and loveable elementary school student.
Most stories center around the character Johnny Deeper fornicating with teachers or being vulgar in the classroom; hence the series enduring popularity with the age group. Some jokes are very simple and play only off Johnny's surname, while others, far more complex, just represent Johnny as a vulgar, but ultimately innocent and loveable elementary school student.
Little Johnny Deeper's mother comes home and catches him on his girlfriend and yells, "Johnny Deeper" and Johnny replies "Gee Mom, I'm in as deep as I can go".
by Darker August 12, 2010
The term "whorebag sally" can be used to describe a variety of different females that one might encounter in the day to day hustle and bustle of life. It is fundamentally synonymous with the terms "slut", "whore", and "skank", but adds in the definite class of using a compound term which other listeners may not understand. It also allows for one to pretend knowledge of a girls name without actually having said information potentially making the user look like a stud.
Roger : Check out the HB in the dress over there.
Dodger : Fucking right Whorebag Sally for the win.
Roger : You know that girl ?
Dodger : Naw, she's just a Whorebag Sally. It happens to be the hip way to say "slut" these days. You lower class peon.
Roger : ::Stunned Silence::
Dodger : Fucking right Whorebag Sally for the win.
Roger : You know that girl ?
Dodger : Naw, she's just a Whorebag Sally. It happens to be the hip way to say "slut" these days. You lower class peon.
Roger : ::Stunned Silence::
by Darker July 23, 2010
An individual who due to a combination of disturbing appearance and an apparant lack of social graces is preordained to become a creeper in later life.
Jean : Hey Jen check out the creeplet.
Jen : What the fuck is creeplet?
Jean : That werido over there. I mean right now -- he just looks outa place, but give him five years and beer belly, and he'll be all like creepy uncle on every girl in this bar.
Jen : What the fuck is creeplet?
Jean : That werido over there. I mean right now -- he just looks outa place, but give him five years and beer belly, and he'll be all like creepy uncle on every girl in this bar.
by Darker August 23, 2009