An act of self-pleasure intended purely for the function of dealing with cronic stress. In many cases; this form of masturbation is grossly satirized with descriptions of men grinding their teeth, audibly growling, and exhibiting a pulsating forehead vein.
Larry : Dude writing my thesis fucking sucks. I'm going to fucking kill myself.
Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.
Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.
Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?
Larry : Furious masturbation?
Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.
Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.
Barry : Dude ... take it easy man you know ... go home ... have a sandwich.
Larry : We are fucking beyond sandwiches here.
Barry : Have you tried furious mastrabation?
Larry : Furious masturbation?
Barry : Masturbating FURIOUSLY, just grabbing that little purple soldier and choking the fucking life out of him while you sit and think about how much your life fucking sucks.
Larry : You’re a genius Barry. I now understand why that bruise on your temple has never healed.
by Darker January 21, 2010