Cuntoleezza Rice's definitions
Special Holy sanitary pads used by Mormon women to protect their Mormon Underwear from "the curse". These are sometimes also used by Mormon men to avoid being embarrassed by Mormon Crotch.
1. Naomi didn't want the class to know she would be unclean for a week, so she used Mormon Panty Liners to hide the shameful stain.
2. Upon seeing his 13-year-old bride, Jeremiah immediately developed Mormon Crotch. Fortunately he had planned ahead, and taped a Mormon Panty Liner over his throbbing member prior to the wedding.
2. Upon seeing his 13-year-old bride, Jeremiah immediately developed Mormon Crotch. Fortunately he had planned ahead, and taped a Mormon Panty Liner over his throbbing member prior to the wedding.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 12, 2008
Get the Mormon Panty Liners mug.A soothing mixture of cocaine and vaseline that Fred Phelps sticks up his ass before sitting on a highway cone or other large object. See Goatse.
Westboro Baptist Church pastor Fred Phelps was at a God Hates Fags rally and asked me to find him some anusthetic. Not content with a simple crucifuck or normal act of pastorbation, he had developed an urgent need to shove something very large up his poop chute.
by Cuntoleezza Rice June 4, 2008
Get the anusthetic mug.A skidmark often found in Mormon Underwear. This is a very common phenomena, as Mormons are not allowed to remove their undies and eventually dig deep while scratching their ass.
Jacob tried to avoid leaving a Mormon Trail by placing Mormon Panty Liners in his buttcrack. Unfortunately he enjoyed the sensation a little too much and woke up one morning with Mormon Crotch.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 16, 2008
Get the Mormon Trail mug.1. An especially skilled prostitute.
2. The Catholic Church as defined by fucktard Fundamentalist Christian evangelist John Hagee
2. The Catholic Church as defined by fucktard Fundamentalist Christian evangelist John Hagee
John Hagee obviously doesn’t know the difference between a great whore and a bunch of kid diddlers. Maybe he should wake up and pull the straw out of Fred Phelch’s ass.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 18, 2008
Get the Great Whore mug.1. The hole in Jesus' side or hand when used for sexual pleasure. See crucifuck.
2. Texas Governor Rick Perry's nickname for his Prison Wallet.
2. Texas Governor Rick Perry's nickname for his Prison Wallet.
Rick Santorum was so horny he was obsessed with getting him some Jesus Hole (a crucifuck). Unfortunately, Jesus had been MIA for 2000 years and Santorum had to go off to the bathhouse for some pussy on a stick. Having left his Mormon Panty Liners at home he left with a Mormon Trail of santorum in his Mormon Underwear.
by Cuntoleezza Rice August 25, 2011
Get the Jesus Hole mug.A female astronaut who traveled 950 miles wearing a diaper to attack the "other woman" in a love triangle.
CAPTAIN: Keep your hands off him bitch!
VICTIM: Yuck, what's that smell? You must be Captain Poopypants.
VICTIM: Yuck, what's that smell? You must be Captain Poopypants.
by Cuntoleezza Rice February 10, 2007
Get the Captain Poopypants mug.Any of several bodily fluids taken from the Pope to make sure all is well with the Holy Father's naughty bits. Usually collected by a Vatican Manginacologist, the samples are checked for disease and and then sent to the FBI for DNA comparison in ongoing kid diddler investigations.
A Papal Smear recently sold on eBay for $135K. No one is sure just who reached under the Pope's gown and stole her grogan.
by Cuntoleezza Rice May 20, 2008
Get the Papal Smear mug.