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Carl Willis's definitions

The Big Dog

Proper noun. The 42nd President of the United States, William Jefferson Clinton. This nickname speaks to Clinton's continuing political clout, reputation for deftness and skill as a politician, and vaunted ability to campaign for Democratic candidates. If you can't run with The Big Dog, you need to stay on the porch, motherfucker!
"Down in the polls, Lieberman tried to call in The Big Dog to rescue his moribund campaign against Lamont. Problem is, The Big Dog only supports Democrats."
by Carl Willis October 24, 2006
mugGet the The Big Dogmug.

skateboarding is not a crime

n. The urban skater's one-line manifesto. Frequently heard blurted out by skateboarding juveniles arrested for vandalism by means of a skateboard, truancy, or marijuana use.

Strictly speaking, the act of personal locomotion on a four-wheeled board is not a crime in any jurisdiction in the United States. However, many cities have outlawed skateboarding on public edifices because it results in destructive grinding and causes injuries, the costs for both of which are borne by the taxpayer.

Furthermore, the culture associated with skateboarding youth is widely held to be a celebration of delinquency: marijuana use, rebellion against authority, truancy, and other problems are known to be prevalent in these juvenile populations. While this is no reason to discriminate against skateboarding in general, it sure doesn't help the image of the activity in the public's eye.
(A boy, about 12 years of age, with long bleached hair and extremely wide corduroy flare pants, is recklessly grinding his way down the outdoor staircase in front of Town Hall on a skateboard.)

Police Officer: "Young man, did I just see you skating down that marble staircase?"

Boy: (stares sullenly at ground) "Skateboarding is not a crime."

Officer: "Take those headphones off while I'm talking to you. Now what does that sign say right there?"

Sign: "Skateboarding on Town Hall property is subject to max. fine of $250 or 90 days in jail by order of City Rev. Code 08-2776."

Boy (fidgeting): "I dunno. Skateboarding is not a crime."

Officer: "And what's this? Did I just see a dime bag fall out of your pocket?"

Boy (crying): "Skateboarding is not a crime."
by Carl Willis October 12, 2004
mugGet the skateboarding is not a crimemug.

noobshop

n. A chatroom or online game server populated with inexperienced and / or juvenile members. The term is pejorative. See also noob.
b3dw3tt3r >> we are so gonna hack the FBI tomorrow nite....come chek out my IRC channel #1337ha><0rz !11

o|-|CoRdYcEpS >> That's it, I'm outta here. What a fucking noobshop! Get a life u n00bs!
by Carl Willis April 3, 2005
mugGet the noobshopmug.

old sparky

n. Nickname for the electric chair, particularly that in the state of Florida.
"Any nigga that pop a cap on a cop gonna take a one-way ride on Old Sparky."
by Carl Willis December 1, 2004
mugGet the old sparkymug.

lead hose

n. A rapid-fire automatic weapon that emits a nearly-continuous stream of bullets.
"After a spate of insurgent attacks, leadership was fed up and decided it was time to wash down the streets of Fallujah with a lead hose. A Humvee-mounted M2 0.50 cal was used on the men at the mosque, while a M134 minigun was chosen to neutralize the women and children in the market. According to FOX News, several insurgents may have been killed in the defensive action."
by Carl Willis June 29, 2006
mugGet the lead hosemug.

snake eyes

n. (1. Non-urban) A roll of two dice in which both show 1.

(2. Urban) The number 1.1, esp. an academic GPA of 1.1
Yolanda: 'Sup Dashante, how's yo midterms lookin'?

Dashante: Not too good, baby. I'm rollin' snake eyes!
by Carl Willis January 27, 2004
mugGet the snake eyesmug.

briznitch

n. A prostitute with an attitude.

The term is derived from "brizzle" and "biznitch", where "brizzle" = "br(oad)" + "izzle" and "biznitch" = "bitch". Snoop Dogg's influence on language is very evident in this word.
"Nigga went down to EZ Lay's Cathouse fo a little somethin-somethin, you know, but all they got up in that piece is a bunch of nasty briznitches".
by Carl Willis February 20, 2005
mugGet the briznitchmug.

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