CATFOOODS's definitions
The moment when a male passes a bowel movement so long that it slaps his scrotum on the way down. It is often necessary that the male stand up in order to accomodate the impressive length and properly birth the entire fecal celebration.
Lance: "What is that brown smudge on the back of your balls?"
Mark: "That's an Anaconda Kiss. I took a dump so huge that I got a free high-five after cutting it with my powerful sphincter."
Mark: "That's an Anaconda Kiss. I took a dump so huge that I got a free high-five after cutting it with my powerful sphincter."
by CATFOOODS September 3, 2013
Get the Anaconda Kiss mug.A form of painting where a man dips his penis in a quality paint and proceeds to whip his penis around in a circular propeller motion.
Clockwise helicopter splatter tends to result in a more smooth and even coating, while counter-clockwise often results in a more textured and artistic look.
Circumcised penises hold more paint, similar to a longer nap on a paint roller.
Clockwise helicopter splatter tends to result in a more smooth and even coating, while counter-clockwise often results in a more textured and artistic look.
Circumcised penises hold more paint, similar to a longer nap on a paint roller.
Jane: "I really want to paint my room but I forgot to buy brushes. Too bad I don't have a penis, otherwise I would just helicopter splatter all over this motherfucker."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Get the Helicopter Splatter mug.When an item is jammed so deep and hard into a man's urethra that the opening rips, making the penis look like a snake's tongue.
Roger: "Damn son, your piss is spraying everywhere! You wearing a fan spray nozzle on your weiner or something?"
Jim: "Nah dude, I fell dick first on a screwdriver last night and it gave me a tip splitter."
Jim: "Nah dude, I fell dick first on a screwdriver last night and it gave me a tip splitter."
by CATFOOODS February 11, 2012
Get the Tip Splitter mug.The method of removing a soiled tampon by connecting the string to a doorknob with a longer string and then slamming the door. Similar to how adult teeth are extracted.
It is common practice and courtesy to drape plastic sheeting along the walls, ceiling, and flooring if this is not performed in one's own home.
It is common practice and courtesy to drape plastic sheeting along the walls, ceiling, and flooring if this is not performed in one's own home.
Lina: "Oh shit, my period ended a week ago and I forgot to take out my tampon! It looks like it's not budging... I better resort to The Old Door Trick before the TSS sets in!"
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Get the The Old Door Trick mug.A variation of the brutal sexually transmitted disease (Smingsmangs) where the functions of the vagina and the anus trade places without physically moving.
Nancy: "Wow Peggy, you have quite a robust queef!"
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Get the Calico Smingsmangs mug.A taxidermy penis of an animal used as a dildo for sexual activities.
Taxidinkers are commonly made from exotic animals such as bears, horses, and dalmatians.
Taxidinkers are commonly made from exotic animals such as bears, horses, and dalmatians.
Robert: "Mom laid the cow penis on the kitchen counter when she was cooking last night instead of throwing it out. Yuck!"
Billy: "Butchers don't give you the penis, Robert... That sounds like a taxidinker if you ask me. Your mom is hot."
Robert: "Shut up, Dad!"
Billy: "Butchers don't give you the penis, Robert... That sounds like a taxidinker if you ask me. Your mom is hot."
Robert: "Shut up, Dad!"
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Get the Taxidinker mug.A connoisseur of smegma who is very skilled in identifying, producing, and harvesting the delicious substance.
Tony: "This wine is bland."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
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