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CATFOOODS's definitions

Calico Smingsmangs

A variation of the brutal sexually transmitted disease (Smingsmangs) where the functions of the vagina and the anus trade places without physically moving.
Nancy: "Wow Peggy, you have quite a robust queef!"
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
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Crop Spraying

Similar to Crop Dusting, Crop Spraying is when one passes gas while walking or running but accidentally expelling excrement as well through one's trousers.
Brad: "I was going to crop dust my little nephew when he was bending over to pet the dog but I accidentally ended up crop spraying them and coating them both with thick diarrhea."
by CATFOOODS January 31, 2012
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The Old Door Trick

The method of removing a soiled tampon by connecting the string to a doorknob with a longer string and then slamming the door. Similar to how adult teeth are extracted.

It is common practice and courtesy to drape plastic sheeting along the walls, ceiling, and flooring if this is not performed in one's own home.
Lina: "Oh shit, my period ended a week ago and I forgot to take out my tampon! It looks like it's not budging... I better resort to The Old Door Trick before the TSS sets in!"
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
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