CATFOOODS's definitions

Calico Smingsmangs

A variation of the brutal sexually transmitted disease (Smingsmangs) where the functions of the vagina and the anus trade places without physically moving.

Nancy: "Wow Peggy, you have quite a robust queef!"
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."

by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012

Helicopter Splatter

A form of painting where a man dips his penis in a quality paint and proceeds to whip his penis around in a circular propeller motion.

Clockwise helicopter splatter tends to result in a more smooth and even coating, while counter-clockwise often results in a more textured and artistic look.

Circumcised penises hold more paint, similar to a longer nap on a paint roller.

Jane: "I really want to paint my room but I forgot to buy brushes. Too bad I don't have a penis, otherwise I would just helicopter splatter all over this motherfucker."

by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012

Tip Splitter

When an item is jammed so deep and hard into a man's urethra that the opening rips, making the penis look like a snake's tongue.

Roger: "Damn son, your piss is spraying everywhere! You wearing a fan spray nozzle on your weiner or something?"
Jim: "Nah dude, I fell dick first on a screwdriver last night and it gave me a tip splitter."

by CATFOOODS February 11, 2012