Braveheart's thirst for blood's definitions

I've been finding

Another classic sentence of doom. Said by your parents/teachers/boss when they notice your stash or discover something out of place that could get you punished.

"I've been finding my VCR was being played with. It's not yours, so don't touch it!" "I've been finding brown underwear in my laundry! You're 24 and you still crap your pants??"

by Braveheart's thirst for blood January 13, 2007

earth sex

When a desperate man who can't get a girl waits until it's raining out and makes a small hole in the muddy ground and inserts his white helmeted soldier of love into it.

"I had no girlfriend back then, so I went outside and had earth sex."

by Braveheart's thirst for blood June 11, 2006

nappy-headed ho

Suggested lyrics for a death-metal song which should be played on a spark transmitter which spams the entire radio area of the electromagnetic spectrum, and puritanical dictators heads will be strapped to the biggest, loudest speaker at the metal concert until they get the concept of true freedom through their lead-shielded skull.

<guitar strum> "nappy-headed ho! opression rots! nappy-headed ho!" <screaming anti-praise for Satan> "the joy and righteousness of selling Cuban cigars to 10 year olds!"<etc>.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood May 2, 2007

two-dimensional organism

A type of mythical creature in the science-fiction/fantasy world that exists in only two dimensions. Is incapable of seeing the third dimension. The most notable feature is that it is required to eat and excrete out of the same orfice. That is, if the digestive system had 2 openings, it would cut the organism in two.

A two-dimensional organism's mouth is also its anus.

Even an ameoba is not a two-dimensional organism.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood June 19, 2007

rabbit pellets

What you get when you are partly constipated and strain with all your might while defecating on the toilet, so called because the tiny balls of feces in the bottom of the toilet look like rabbit dung.

"I strained for half an hour in that bathroom and all I was able to get were rabbit pellets."

by Braveheart's thirst for blood August 20, 2006

nastygram

A legal document stating that you should stop doing something, written in legalese and with the threat of taking you to court. A cease & desist letter.

When they released the FooCat :CueCat barcode scanner decrypting software, DigitalConvergence sent them a nastygram. My neighbor's lawyer sent me a nastygram telling me that my son is playing his Satanic non-music too loud and drawing pentagrams using plant food on his lawn, and will sue me for $666,666.00 if he doesn't quit.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood January 10, 2006

Death Penalty

An effective method of deterring truly worthless individuals from doing a capital offense again. Works better when someone is killed based on their actions (like sodomize a child) than things they did not choose to do (like be black) The only thing that rocks more than the death penalty is the Deity. Whoops, one thing rocks more than the Deity, a Deity which has automatic death penalty (which occured in Biblical times)

Schoolite: We should abolish the death penalty because it kills people who have value. Me: Well if you want a world full of people who do violent and sexual crimes, then the death penalty is not for you.

by Braveheart's thirst for blood January 21, 2006