BenchMax345's definitions

Fuck You

Fuck You is how you say fuck you in America.

Paul: I bench more than you kid.
Kid: Fuck you!

by BenchMax345 March 3, 2008

OHLAP

Oklahoma Higher Learner Access Program (abbrev. OHLAP) is an Oklahoma's Promise scholarship granted for low income parents. Parents with an income of less than $50,000 a year and high school student(s) who worked their ass off earned it. There are specific high school courses that must be taken in order for OHLAP to be rewarded. OHLAP is one of the fastest growing scholarships in Oklahoma. OHLAP pays full tuition towards your college degree. This is a very godly/Chuck Norris scholarship that people take for granted. To date, over 30,000 students enrolled for OHLAP since its inception (source: my high school counselor). The higher your parent’s income, the better your ACT scores have to be in order to achieve…OHLAP (ACT score of a 30 right here BOOYAH! Flawlessly pwned). In order for the effects of this scholarship to remain beneficial, you must maintain a grade point average of an A> (3.60>.) and "promise" to stay away from trouble (i.e. drugs, alcohol, your mom). This scholarship can only be negated by successfully acquiring your bachelor degree or simply "student of failures." On the negative side of the spectrum, if you procrastinated your ass off and haven't procure your bachelor degree within the five years period, then OHLAP's powerful effects will eventually diminish; hence, your balls will be tragically suppress in a hectic manner (which in turn leads to death of purple balls). Absurdly, OHLAP has some dark secrets to deny its existence by your side (which will, in terms, give you a deadly purple nurple). For more history on OHLAP, you must google it. I'm only here to provide this information b/c I have too much time in my hands. Yes, I know; I'm very immature, but I'm hope you're smart enough to tie your own shoes and determine which information is false (i.e. your balls and breast being mutilated).

Vy and I got OHLAP b/c we pwned every AP courses. And mainly, b/c I can bench press 345lbs in high school and pwned the AP Calculus exam with a five. OHLAP is pleased. HOOAH!

by benchmax345 August 25, 2008

Valentineless

Someone who does not have a valentine. They seek hope, but they face a severe beat down. Although this symptom temporary, it may lead to a catastrophic event.

Friend: Who's your valentine?
Me: No one, I'm Valentineless.
Friend: Oh.

by BenchMax345 February 14, 2008

Fake Bacon

This word can be use to describe any person who fake noticeable "tanish" skin. Although their friends may say that they look "naturally" tan, it's a lie. It is clearly noticeable. Let's not lie to ourself here. What is natural is the skin color that you were born with. In conclusion, if you think you need a tan, then the truth is that you put yourself below every normal human being. On the plus side, you Fake Bacon provide society with laughter and entertainment with your fake tan look. Congrats.

Chick (came to a party sizzling): Sup gangsta! Do you like my new tan?
Random Person: Dude, you're a fake bacon! lol
Chick: (Leave the party and cry.)

by BenchMax345 February 15, 2008

w^5

w^5 is read as w to the fifth. w^5 is translated to "which was what we wanted."

David: We got the answer to be 56 cm cube. Now, I'm going to check the answer...and it is 56 cm cube... w^5 BOOYAH!

by BenchMax345 February 8, 2009

Powerful

1. When anything or anyone excend the ability to over bench 300lbs and when the scouter read its power level to be OVER 9,000.
2. The ability to do anything (such as banging your mom).
3. Chuck Norris.

D: Why the fuck did you do that?!!\
V: Cause I'm POWERFUL!!!!!


V: I aced the test cause the teacher printed it in the library
D: POWERFUL!

by BenchMax345 May 21, 2009

faggot snapshot

When a guy poses for the mirror and takes pictures of himself with a camera or his cellphone (typically with his cellphone). These guys normally take off their shirt and take a picture of themselves to attract higher level of queers. It is very commonly seen on myspace,facebook, and other social networking sites. Guys who faggot snapshot of themselves are known as queer baits.

I have a six pac and I want to show it off to all the ladies on my facebook. So I became shirtless and snapped some so-called "hot" pictures of myself in front of the mirror. The next day, I attracted a shitload of queers and all the girls lol'd at me.

by BenchMax345 November 30, 2011