Are2Dee2's definitions

apple picking

Engaging in a pattern of theft where one "picks" apple products (typically iPhones) out of unsuspecting passenger hands on Chicago public transportation systems like the L.

Can be color-coded to denote specific lines of the L

"Haven't seen you in a minute man, where you been at?"

"I was Red apple picking last night and got 2 old 3Gs and a brand new 4GS."

"Better sell those quick before they get hot and woowoowoo."

by Are2Dee2 January 9, 2012

Riddler

Typically refers to a guy who dresses in a completely inappropriate manner for a given social situation. In truth, a riddler cannot be defined, and is only fully understood once he is seen in person.

"Look at this fucking Riddler. Who the fuck wears white driving loafers, blue jeans, a tuxedo shirt, cardigan, and a god damn Yankees cap to a dive bar!?"

by Are2Dee2 November 25, 2010

Fabian Strategy

Method of getting your way in disputes with your girlfriend by appearing to give into her demands. The Fabian strategy derives it's name from the Roman general Quintus Fabius Maximus. He ran away, rather than engage in battle, he would retreat and retreat until the enemy grew fatigued and eventually made a mistake. Though I abhor it as a military strategy, it is the basis for all successful personal relationships.

My girlfriend wanted to re-paint the hallway so rather than say yes or no, I employed the Fabian Strategy and asked her if her sister had done anything crazy lately. She spent an hour ranting about that and totally forgot to ask me about the paint samples she brought home. She is sleeping peacefully and Fabian (me) has retreated to his den where he is drinking scotch and playing Snood.

by Are2Dee2 March 25, 2011

jelly beans

Ronald Reagan's favorite snack. Also the method used by his administration to make his mouth move in the later years of his administration when his brain was "off."

Give him some Jelly Beans and then I'll do the voice over while he's chewing.

by Are2Dee2 October 22, 2010

Browns Chicken Massacre

The big shit you take after eating a load of fried chicken (especially its from Brown's Chicken).

"I had a bucket full of Brown's Chicken and pasta last night and this morning did a Browns Chicken Massacre on my toilet."

by Are2Dee2 December 4, 2010

pity digits

A phone number you give/get from a girl/guy the morning after you sleep with him/her even though you have absolutely no intention of calling him/her ever again, but it makes the whole goodbye thing way less awkward

I hooked up with a girl last night; she was annoying and I never want to see her again, so the next morning I got some pity digits when I dropped her off so it wouldn't be weird.

by Are2Dee2 October 9, 2009