Anonymous submissions's definitions

Potteresque

Truly magical/indefinably awesome- a versatile term encompassing a wide range of classy actions and objects

Liverpool coming back from 3-0 down in the 2005 Champions League final to win it was a potteresque performance.

by Anonymous submissions June 24, 2020

Labia lady tonight

The original title for the Frank Sinatra classic; 'Luck, be a lady tonight.' The title was changed after producers found that focus groups struggled to relate to lyrics about a woman comprised almost entirely of cuntflaps.

Frank (singing in studio): 'Labia lady tonight, your beef curtains gave me a fright'
Producer: 'Ahhh, Frank, those lyrics really aren't doing it for me- I think fans will struggle to relate to a woman with engorged labia'
Frank: (farts disapprovingly)

by Anonymous submissions December 31, 2016

Better out than intimate

To break wind whilst being intimate with someone. The release of said gas is often associated with the other participant(s) in the sexual act discontinuing their participation.

''Well, looks like I'm on the hunt for a new girlfriend again. Susie and I were really connecting spiritually and emotionally during an extended Alabama lane change, but a better out than intimate squeezed its way out of my anüs as I was going for it and the gas has caused her to suffocate and die. If I'm being brutally honest, the initial chloroform might have been a culprit in the suffocation too.''

by Anonymous submissions August 7, 2018

fanalysis

The systematic appraisal of a fanny (gash) using a set of predefined, uniform measures including smell, taste, acidity, presence of pubic hair, labia size and level of resemblance to a badly wrapped kebab. One should also comment upon how eager one is to 'smash' it, given the opportunity. Synonymous with 'gashessment'

So I did a fanalysis on Ruth last night and she scored really well- bald as a badger from her clunge to her aintcha, and kebab was well packed, but had to mark her down on the smell as it had the aroma of a rotting salmon carcas. Would still smash the shit out of it again though given the chance, but I'm all out of rufies, so can't see it happening anytime soon

by Anonymous submissions October 4, 2016

Frankfurter foliage

The pubic hair surrounding, and often intruding onto the male phallus.

Jane: 'Wow, Johnny, I like what you've done with your frankfurter foliage; the braids look great'
Johnny: 'Thanks Jane, I thought you'd like them. Now, if you wouldn't mind, please continue sucking and let's keep the rest of the small talk until after the vinegar strokes. I'm paying you by the hour and every time you talk I am forced to look at you and be reminded about how utterly repulsive you actually are.'

by Anonymous submissions November 13, 2016

Standard deviantAsian

A slant (pun intended) on the traditional statistical feature of standard deviation whereby the sexual deviance levels of an Asian male can be predicted by positive linear equation, as they are largely constant

'What is it about being a standard deviantAsian? Here I was minding my own business enjoying a spot of inoccuous Japanese porn in the work toilet cubicle on my lunch break when the whole thing inevitably descended into a bukkake fest. It was terribly off-putting. Those crazy Asians like filth nearly as much as they like rice and foot binding'

by Anonymous submissions December 30, 2016

Charles Dickcunts

The visionary pornographic director behind such adult film classics as 'A tale of two clitties,' 'David Copafeel' and 'Great expecting Asians.'

'Dude, did you catch the new Charles Dickcunts porno on Pay-per-view last night? I haven't been that hard since I watched 'The Res-erection of Christ; this time Jesus does the nailing.'

by Anonymous submissions March 1, 2017