Angus McCracken's definitions

Bag O' Chips and a Coke

(Noun) What a Catholic priest offers an alter boy to get the taste of semen out of his mouth.

Now now don't cry I know that stuff doesn't taste great but here is a wee bag o' chips and a coke. Remember it is our secret.

by Angus McCracken February 11, 2020

Peek-a-Boo

What you imagine your hemorrhoids saying after a long day on your feet.

Honey where is the Preperation H? My dam hemorrhoids are playing peek-a-boo again.

by Angus McCracken February 4, 2020

Snow Job

When you think your girl friend has swallowed your load only to have your own semen deceptively spat back into your mouth while kissing her.

Dude your Mom said she swallowed but then gave me a nasty snow job.

by Angus McCracken January 24, 2020

Purple Headed Darth Vader

How nerds at Comic Con refer to their penis while trying to hit on other nerds.

Hey baby wanta go back to my place and check out my purple headed darth vader - the force is strong in him. Regret it you will not.

by Angus McCracken January 24, 2020

Safety Plank

The wooden board you strap horizontally across your ass to prevent you from falling into the cavernous vagina your are about to slam.

I told him to use a safety plank but oh no he knew better. Dude we had to call the fire department to get him out of her vagina.

by Angus McCracken January 25, 2020

Hungry Sparrow

(Noun) a character in the world of penis puppetry. The hungry sparrow can only be created from an uncircumcised penis. The puppeteer grabs the very tip of the uncircumcised penis separating the flaps of foreskin thereby creating an opening, whilst pulling the penis directly upward. The result is the appearance of a hungry sparrow yearning sky ward, looking for his Mom and the promise of food. A puppeteer with advanced skills can manipulate the foreskin in a manner that when combined with bird calls truly brings the hungry sparrow to life.

When he gets drunk he runs around the party showing everyone his hungry sparrow. It is just not cool.

by Angus McCracken February 8, 2020

Nickers Snickers

(Noun) a reasonably polite term to identify that you have just shit your pants.

More commonly used in the UK by the posh upper crust.

I dare say old boy what is that smell?

Terribly sorry it would appear as though I've just dropped a steaming pile of nickers snickers

by Angus McCracken February 22, 2020