To point something out in amusing fashion. Originates from the north west of england.
Oh geoff, deeks that fuckin' mare ower theer.
(I say geoff, did your fantastic eyesight permit you to peruse over the visual delight of that nearby female stunner?)
Cumbrian #1: Fancy a ball and biscuit?
Cumbrian #2: Eh?
Cumbrian #1: (While whipping his bollocks out and laughing) DEEKS!
Cumbrian #2: Ahhh you fuckin twat!
Deeks him with the face.
"See that girl over yonder, she is a gash guzzler."
When falling asleep while fingering a girl (usually drunk) and your finger is left in the entire night.
"Cor blimey, I have a stiff little finger this golden morn."
When much time is spent fingering a girl you will gain a wrinkle finger (similar to that of being in a bath too long)
"Hey, check out my wrinkle finger thanks to your gash."
When standing as far away from the toilet as possible and attempting to piss in the bowl. Works best when cock is erect.
"Wow, that Piss-arc I just had was as beautiful as a rainbow."
If you need a piss and instead decide to masturbate, you will experience a stinging sensation if taking the piss shortly after ejaculating.
"I had piss sting and regretted ever wanking at all."
Pronounced "Two-ss" (like loose but with a t)
A person, usually male (then again that usually makes it more hilarious when describing a female), of twattish proportions. ie, he's a divvy. Better used between friends rather than to really annoy someone, as it doesn't seem to have the same impact as something like "how in holy fuck did your mother shit you out you fat cunt".
Derived from the word "tuss" - Tousse is how a posh person may say tuss and therefore sounded funny as fuck. Originated in a dalston secondary school in cumbria, england.
Cumbrian #1: Is that daft lad wearing rockports?
Cumbrian #2: Aye, what a fuckin' tousse.
Cumbrian #1: (Attemping to solve a particularly hard maths problem)
Cumbrian #2: Deeks! (farts in #1's face while laughing)
Cumbrian #1: (trying to hold in laughter)...Tousse.