woodke

1. When you put a big key up your or someone elses dick-hole and move it all around. and do the hokey pokey, while shoving a doorknob in your anus.

2. placing splinters inside of a woman's vajayjay.

1. Nick: yeah, did you hear that Ian gave himself a Woodke yesterday?
Jake John: oh yeah i did, i heard his parents put him in an institute.

2. its kinda gay.

woodke by turkish dix January 23, 2008

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Wooden shield

Ultra-effective chess tactic whereby a diagonal piece (i.e. a bishop or a queen) attacks 4 opponent pieces at the same time, so that the attacked pieces form an X-shape between each other, thus (according to legendary chess grandmaster xQc) resembling a wooden shield. The best move in response to the wooden shield tactic is considered to be resignation, as computers are yet to find a position where any response to the tactic doesn't lose on the spot. The tactic is considered to be incomprehensible to inexperienced players and even grandmasters, and only exceptionally high-IQ individuals with an IQ of 107 over are considered to be capable of understanding it.

Coined by prominent proponent of the Bing-Bang-Boom chess philosophy GM xQc, the wooden shield is an essential part of the theory behind the Flying Dragon, Knight variation, as well as the Flying Dragon, I Take Your Pawn variation openings, which build upon the idea that early pawns don't matter - an idea repeatedly corroborated by top-of-the-line engines and neural nets such as AlphaZero.

Noob: I'm a queen, a rook, and two pieces up in material, this guy's got no chance.
107-IQ God: *smirks* Omae wa mou shindeiru
107-IQ God: *plays the wooden shield*
Noob: *resigns in shame*

Wooden shield by Jacques Hayeilliheaulds May 22, 2020

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Related Words

woodke • woodkeleah • woodkernes • woodpecker • woodie • wooder • woodle • woodberry • wooden spoons • Woodpecking

Captain Woodie

1) Refers to a part which serves no constructive purpose, but desires to lead.
2) Leadership by focusing on why we failed rather than on how we can do better to succeed.
3) Lack of planning, communication, insight, and follow-up. A bad leader who talks a good game but does nothing to achieve the goal then brags about how close we came to success and blames bad luck for the loss.

Captain Woodie came to run the meeting, but only talked about how much he loved being in the Marine Corps. Consequently, nothing got done and no decisions were made. We wasted an afternoon because of the wood!

Everyone was pissed that we’d failed to meet our objective, and then Captain Woodie told us that there were just too many obstacles and we’d have to beat our heads against the wall for a long time before we could expect to win.

We could have been better prepared for the competition, but no one planned any training, or told us anything. After the race, while we were trying to figure out how to get home, a captain woodie came out and told us how we could have won if we’d had just a bit more luck

Captain Woodie by Stan West April 14, 2006