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u/alt-no-more

Everyone said buying condoms was no big deal and nobody would say anything....

Well that was a fucking lie.

I pull up at Walgreens and I walk over to the aisle with condoms. I go “well shit, I guess i need some deodorant too.” So I pick some up and then grab a box of condoms.

I get to the checkout line, i’m standing there and this one old lady is like “excuse me son, mind me asking how old you are?” And i’m like “Ummm I’m 16?” Then she purses her lips and makes this judging ass face and says, “Aren’t you a little young to be using those?”

At this point the other 5 people in the line are all looking at me so I got angry and just started acting snarky. “Oh, my bad lady, Imma just hit it raw and hope she don’t get knocked up.” She felt offended so she shut up pretty quick.

AND THEN when I get to the front of the line, the fucking cashier scans the box, smiles and says, “first time with these?” Are you fucking kidding me? Why would he ask that? Whatever. I just said “Um no second actually.” (Even though it was actually my first).

Ughhh. Anyways I hate people. I just want to buy some condoms in peace damn.
u/alt-no-more wanted to purchase condoms and now he's a celebrity
u/alt-no-more by u/tryinng December 25, 2018
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u/alt-no-more

A teenager on Reddit who made a post about a cashier complaining about him buying condoms.
Hey, u/alt-no-more reminds me of u/waterguy12’s Reddit fame.
u/alt-no-more by NRA December 27, 2018

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility
I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.
sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".
A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.
Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.
"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."
Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.
I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.
schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008

eye bleach 

Looking or experiencing something nice after witnessing something horrid like a disgusting gif or a disturbing video. Typically used as eye bleach are nice images of whatever makes the disturbed person happy.
"Bleach my eyes! Why is that woman's face ripped off!?"
*Looks up images of puppies and kittens.*
"That's good eye bleach."
eye bleach by Rini2012 November 29, 2016