Sock gnomes are an ancient folk who hail from Germany. They sneak into people’s houses and steal their socks. Only the left ones though. The purpose of this is to wear them as hats. Its very necessary to their survival. Other common names for them are as follows;
hat people,
helmet folk, hut luete, and sockenzwerg. They refer to themselves as
hat people because socks don’t exist to them. The big people are the crazy stupid giants. When the big peole come, the sock gnomes riot. Their weapon of choice is the pitchfork which they ise to stab people right in between the
leg bone and the knee cap. This will bring their enemies to their knees, but not for
long because of the excruciating pain. Then they fall on their faces and the sock gnomes tie them down with little pieces of string. The sock gnomes are also brilliant engineers. They actually invented the
leg warmer, the back massager, cheez itz,
tom holland, and the tenor saxaphone. In sock
gnome legend, there is a messaih who will come wearing 100% wool socks on their
head that are also waterproof. This person is destined to be ruler of all sock gnomes. Sock gnomes to this day hold a bitter grudge against the big people because of the rednpointy hatted stereotype they have created.
