skate-tard

Alternatively spelled "skatard" but usually isn't spelled that way because stupid people usually mispronounce it.

Someone who took up skateboarding simply because it's the only thing that'll get him laid, or at least somewhat close, maybe with an ugly girl. Even before actually owning a skateboard, he covers everything he owns in every sticker with a name brand on it: volcom, etnies, element, etc...
After establishing his "skater" title, he suddenly thinks his penis grew by eight inches, and thinks his body grew a foot in height, and thinks his balls gained 2 pounds in weight. In reality, however, he's still fuck-ugly, five foot four, can't skate very well, has a dick the size of his pinky finger, and does nothing but piss everyone off and make a gigantic douchebag out of himself, just like BEFORE he took up skateboarding.

Of course, this all isn't limited to skating. It's also seen in snowboarders, wannabe hicks, wannabe stoners, and surfers.

"That skate-tard Derek gave me a nasty mean face the other day, so I knocked him out, shat on his face and threw him in a dumpster"
"Good stuff."

by The Earl of Sandwich August 13, 2007

skatetarded

Someone who watches people skate and can talk about it till the cows come home, but who really has no idea whatsoever how to skate.

Also, a skater who has no capability for judgement of distances and obstacles as dictated by their own skill.

1) I love skates and my guy can skateboard witht he best of them, but I'm completely skatetarded.

2) That idiot only broke his ankle because he's skatetarded and didn't realize that his skill level prevents him from sticking nine-flat-nine stairwell jumps.

by Pixie Stix October 7, 2007