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A Pubic Inch is a fictional dynamic unit of measurement that varies according to the sex of the person using it and also the context in which it is being used.

For men trying to cover up the fact theyve got a tiny prick, a pubic inch is exactly twice that of an standard British inch (conversion factor 1:2). The pubic inch allows them to save face and convince themselves they are no less of a man, even though theyve only got a chippolatta rather than a beef bayonet.

For men joking about the size of any of their mates cocks, a pubic inch becomes half that of a standard inch (conversion factor 2:1), in order for them to feel good about their miniscule winkies.

For women talking about the size of their long term boyfriends johnson, a pubic inch is twice that of a normal inch so they can boast about their amazing sex life, when actually he goes to sleep after 5 minutes of frantic pumping, shoots his load and leaves her unsatisfied everytime. But at least her girlfriends think she's got a good sex life, and because like all women she cares more about what other people think of her than her own happiness, then its all ok (take high heels as a perfect example, constant pain just because they think it looks good, stupidity at its highest)

For women telling their friends about the guy they shagged last night or the long term boyfriend theyve just split up with (who probably performed as above), a pubic inch becomes the size of the lady in questions little finger. Demonstrated by clenching the fist and wiggling the little finger about like a maggot
Yeah ive got massive cock, at least 9 inches long.
I saw jeffs knob in the shower n its like a button mushroom! Probably only an inch at most!
Well, my bobbys got a huge knob, at least 10 inches! And we dont have sex, we make love and its just beautiful.
Oh my god you should have seen it! It was like a baby catapiller! (wiggles her little finger)
by Rickyricardo August 24, 2005
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