non-wf-phobia 

having a fear of any food not bought at Whole Foods Market. generally vegans, vegetarians, and Whole Foods addicts are most prone to this disease. symptoms include anxiety attacks or breaking out in hives when faced with food from any store other than Whole Foods Market.

Example 1:
person: dude, these new roasted garlic super lard-packed Cheezy Yummy-o's are da bomb, you wanna try one?

vegan: *breaking out in a sweat* naw man, sorry I can't, I've got non-wf-phobia

Example 2:
person: hey girlie, whaddup? wanna come to my slumber party with Lakisha, Rohondra, Edwiana and Sue tonight? We gonna watch chick flicks and eat excessive amounts of Ben and Jerry's ice cream!!

non-wf-phobiac: errhh *rummages around purse desperately searching for anxiety medicine* I don't think I'll be able to make it, I need to groom my hampster..or something..

Example 3:

Person 1: dude, look at Kylee with her expensive Whole Foods lunch again.
Person 2: yeah man, I think she's turned into a non-wf-phobiac. She spends way too much time with her vegan-hippie friends

non-wf-phobia by GreekWannabeVegan February 11, 2012