When Complainer-in-Chief's compulsive need for continuous media attention causes him to then claim: 1. The media is the "Enemy of the People" and out to smear my "good" name, 2. He is the victim of someone he hired/nominated, 3. He is the victim of some hot mess or drama he created, 4. He is "The only one" able to fix anything and everything wrong in America then hurls blame in every other direction when he can't.
Stay tuned for more on this breaking story "Munchausen by Presidency"... WH reports fire in West Wing...man seen here holding large hose between legs - apparently dousing flames, single-handedly extinguishing blaze. "White House goes down in flames" Drone footage someone hiding behind South Lawn shed, digging, 2 gas cans seen nearby. Perp seen fleeing in pink robe, flat orange beret. Another in 5" pumps.

WH tweet "Using very large hands, and huuuge hose, to extinguish very hot fire, huuge flames - sizzingling, bigly, very hot flames." Smoke alarms blare like copter blades in newly-released 9-1-1 recording, man bellowing, "House was on fire..it was. It's out now. I am the only one who can extinguish a fire this size. It was uuuuuuge. I can put it out though. I did it ...by myself. I'm very strong. Flames fear me. Not like last resident. Most people don't know how thick my hose is. It pumps enough to douse any sized flame. There was one I couldn't put out easily myself though; it was hot...some say I am hot! ...I won't argue. A bright orange nest of hairspray landed on me. All of my dear friends arrived just in time...they extinguished that one - wasn't very big. Very special people --porn stars. Always there when I need a leak... I mean, a hand. Wait...ok good talking to you. Breaking FoxNews coming on now - gotta go watch"
by Ladyjanenc December 4, 2018
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