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An awkward, gentle (often unwanted) rubbing of the mons pubis. Not sexually stimulating in the least. Usually initiated after recipient appears to be in deep sleep.

#BEWARETHEMONSSEUSE
Girl 1: How was it with Johnny last night?
Girl 2: Really, really weird. I was almost asleep, and then he started giving me a monssage.
Girl 1: That's when you kiss him on the cheek, say "Make sure you lock the door on your way out," and roll over.
by Beware the Monssage October 19, 2013
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