lava-ware

Collective noun referring to the useless banner ads that decorate free web sites. The sites receive income by selling ad spaces to various smutty companies such as ambulence-chasing law firms, knock-off boutiques, etc. at the expense of web surfers' sanity.

The term "lava-ware" was coined because dodging these banners is comparable to walking across a room only stepping on objects that are not the floor because the floor is lava.

The danger of lava-ware is generally restricted to touch screen media such as tablets and smart phones where such banners can be difficult to avoid touching.

Lava-ware evolved from the pop-up technology that once plagued non-touch interfaces; those that persist today have adapted with very small and unreachable "x" buttons that serve to close thd window.

Hipster 1: "Bromandude, did you check the weather for tonight yet? If it's gonna rain I'm totes gonna rock the fedora, otherwise I'm hitting the town with my understated tipped quaff."

Hipster 2: "Sorry dudemanbro, I was scrolling through my gps radar from the local news page and super dissed my manicure on some lava-ware for snuggies."

lava-ware by Dairy-Maid November 19, 2013