ditchman

A wingman who provides you an excuse to ditch a date, usually by calling or texting at a prearranged time. The recipient of the call or text can choose whether to use the ditchman as an excuse or not, depending on how the date is going.

Did you hear about that asshole in Austin who's suing a girl for texting in a movie he took her to? I guarantee that was her ditchman texting because he was a creep.

by AdmiralPercy May 19, 2017

Jesper Dichmann

- Noun
Chicargo-slang. Commonly used for people with an eating disorder.

Rasmus: Ay you fat
Justin: nah i just have Jesper Dichmann
Rasmus: aight fair enough

by MikeTheShikes April 6, 2019

Non-Flying Dutchman

The Iceman. DB10. Bruce Rioch's sole stroke of genius. The finest import in the history of the Premier League. An enigmatic, reserved, ice-cold magician with an inexplicable phobia of flying.

It can naturally also refer to any other person of Dutch descent who suffers from pteromechanophobia.

Martin - Who was that player who cruelly toyed with Nikos Dabizas before slotting home against those Geordies around 2002?

Nige - The non-flying Dutchman, of course.

Martin - Ah yes, how could I forget...Whatever happened to that poor lad Dabizas?

Nige - He was clearly traumatised by the Dutch master

by TheIcemanStrikesAgain January 21, 2011

The Laughing Dutchman

When you fart under the covers and pull the blankets over your partners head... then tickle them so they are forced to breathe deep in between bouts of laughter.... and tears.

Karen: Hey, smell this flower my boyfriend gave me!
Alyssa: I can't, Matt gave me the Laughing Dutchman last night and nothing has been right since...
Karen: Is that why you have been crying all day?
Alyssa: It was taco tuesday.

by Pink Eye in Both Eyes July 30, 2013

dutchman handshake

Same thing as a dutch rudder, but with a cooler and more convenient name

As his best friend he gives him a dutchman handshake every week.

by mircea.ene July 30, 2010

Dutchman's Fullhouse

Having a two flush dump that requires no wiping.

Jesse was dealt a Dutchman's Fullhouse after a heavy night of drinking and tacos. He was now the envy of his friends.

by Oskee Wow Wow March 9, 2009

Lost Dutchman

When a married man loses his wedding ring inside a prostitute's ass. The act is not completed until the man sheepishly retrieves his ring.

When Tom could not explain to his wife where his ring was, he realized that he had to complete the final stage of the Lost Dutchman.

by ClarenceCarterIV May 19, 2006