Soothing applications of fingernails dat you give someone's back in praise/admiration for some major accomplishment dat he's attained, such as landing a job, getting a promotion, becoming engaged/married, etc.
Garfield likes to give Jon his own unique type of "conscratchulations" --- i.e., with the help of his eighteen paws-mounted "little friends" --- but somehow Jon never seems to appreciate said laudatory gestures nearly so much as Garfield enjoys administering them to him.
When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).