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clusterflake

clusterflake is the social phenomenon characterized by a buttload of people just not showing up, typically so sporadically, in such numbers, and with so little advance warning that the original plan or plans are thrown into disintegrating disarray. (syn: cluster flake)
"Despite a week's notice more than half the movie group clusterflaked, most without even calling."

"We'd arranged a big dinner, followed by a meet with another crew, then all hit a party downtown. Three people showed up in total, the whole night. It was a complete cluster flake."
by Dude I Flaked April 21, 2008
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Clusterfucked

When you're days away from coming out of your fourth COVID lockdown and your local health authority advises that a new and dangerous strain has just been detected and that it would be imprudent to open up until the source of the new cluster is identified. In this context, clusterfuck is a portmanteau of COVID cluster plus being situationally fucked.
Health Official: 'With the discovery of this new and highly transmissible variant, which is unrelated to the existing outbreak, the government will not be relaxing COVID restrictions as previously scheduled. In summary, you have just been clusterfucked"
by Ernest_Hemmingroid June 4, 2021
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clusterfuckemus

The unrelenting and unceasing fuckening of one's life by outside forces such as governmental ineptitude, inadequate world pandemic response, unending financial crises, escalating social unrest and the total denial of reality by a significant percentage of the population.
The year 2020 has been a total clusterfuckemus.
by ILUsion54 November 13, 2020
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clusterfucked

To be completely and totally screwed. To be in a state of utter, unavoidable, unthinkably insane screwage. A point in which one feels as though there is no way out of a current situation or predicament.
I was on this plane taxiing down the runway when a commuter train ran off the tracks and crashed through the airport fence. This event then caused a freeway overpass to collapse sending roughly 200 automobiles down towards the plane. The train was coming at us along with the cars and I said aloud "We're so clusterfucked".
by MacSawD November 26, 2004
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clusterfuckery

a mess of confusion, disorganization, bungling or incompetence
I woulda been on time if not for the heinous clusterfuckery of traffic.

The meeting was a solid hour of clusterfuckery.
by Lynn January 23, 2004
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clusterfucker

The person who is in charge (usually military) at the time of a clusterfuck. This person is usually inept at his/her job, and has used all possible resources to carry out a simple, straightforward task, only to start a cataclysmic chain of events.

One who clusterfucks, or has been clusterfucking. Can also be referred to as one who has been up to a bit of clusterfuckery.
1. "But General, I asked the Lieutenant to polish the big red button not push it. I know we have inadvertently started a major nuclear war with the worlds biggest superpower, but it should be that clusterfucker Corporal facing the firing squad, not me Sir."

2. "That window cleaner has not only made the windows dirtier, but he's also smashed four pains of glass and killed my dog! Well, I suppose I'd better go and give that clusterfucker his money before I phone the glazier and find the spade."

3. "I wish I wasn't such a useless clusterfucker."
by clusterfukr January 2, 2010
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Clusterfuckectomy

The actual removal of a clusterfucker once a "cluster fuck inquisition" has been completed.
We have determined who the clusterfucker is and completed the clusterfuckectomy as requested.

Richard Nixon would have endured the rath of the clusterfuckectomy.
by The Tongliao Trio November 2, 2010
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