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clawsturbate 

To masturbate with a claw or pincer.

Crabs, lobster, hermit crabs, Dr. Zoidberg, crayfish, war vets, and other pincered organisms can clawsturbate (and probably do).
The hermit crab began to clawsturbate when he was chosen as a new pet.
clawsturbate by MarcT October 14, 2009
Words you can keep

Crapsturbate 

Masturbate while taking a dump; Fapping and shitting at the same time.
The other day I was so horny that I decided to crapsturbate in the public bathroom.

Crapsturbate 

When you jack off to porn that involves, well, shit.
Ebby: 2 girls 1 cup always makes me crapsturbate.
Me: Well it always makes me throw up.
Crapsturbate by Tikibarberfan July 12, 2010

chawsterbate 

when you masturbate with a dip (chaw) in your lip.
Joe: "Hey guys, I was thinking of going spike hunting and sitting on the biggest one! Wanna join?"
Bob: "Yea! Sounds like a swell time. Anthony come hold hands with me and Joe while we sit on tons of spikes!"
Anthony: "Sounds enticing, but I think I'll hold down the fort and chawsterbate while you and Corynn are out of the room."
chawsterbate by meatpacker69 October 20, 2012

classturbator

(n.)- an individual who masturbates during class

classturbation -(v.)The act of feeling the sudden urge to masturbate purfusely during school hours. Usually the kid in the school that gets his ass kicked on a daily basis, yet still has the dignity to beat his meat the next day.

Billy: "Hey Mike!"
Mike: "What?"
Billy: "Scott Terry (from Boardman, Ohio) beat his meat in Wood Shop, Science and Math all in two school days!"
Mike: "Wow, what a perve, let's go beat his ass."
Billy: "Yeah, damn classturbator!"

Clapturbate

When you swing your penis up and down so it goes between your legs. When it goes between your legs it will reach between your ass cheeks and your ass cheeks will clench on your penis and you will pull it out rubbing along the taint eventually leading to ejaculation. Right before your penis gets clenched between your ass cheeks it makes a huge clap noise upon impact so you are essentially clapping your cheeks. This works best with shit stains in your ass cheeks, they work as a lubricant.
When ever I clapturbate my family hears me and complains they worry it will give me an STD.
Clapturbate by Scrotum Slayer May 19, 2018

crasturbate 

to masturbate and cry at the same time. Usually performed by male graduate students in the sciences or engineering. Common causes include: no women around, ugliness, poverty, stress, being dumped, etc.
last night I thought of <name> so I crasturbated
crasturbate by Bob Carlyle October 31, 2005
More from Urban Dictionary

Salad Days 

green inexperienced youthful judgement and cold blooded execution of those judgements.

Rashness with little concern of consequence.

Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare

"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."

- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
"How did you end up in jail?"

"Salad days, 'nuf said."
Salad Days by GilbyRFC0 October 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 28, 2026

age gate 

An absolutely foolproof way to keep minors from viewing content deemed "too mature" for them to watch.
Billy: "So I was trying to watch some videos for an M rated game, and I ran into an age gate, so I put in my real birthday. SOMEHOW it managed to figure out that I am 12. CURSE YOU AGE GATE!!!"

Bill: "Fucking age gate! *quick scroll* THERE! I was born on January 1, 1904. Fuck you age gate."
age gate by Banja January 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 27, 2026

board chow 

A)
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.

B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
A)
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.

B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
board chow by BinaryHackerMan September 3, 2007
Word of the Day on August 26, 2026

young pup 

a young person, a young adult in their late teens/early 20s.
Ah, you're just a young pup at 23!
young pup by the dog May 30, 2006
Word of the Day on August 25, 2026
West Midlands slang word for rockers, bikers, greasers etc. In the late 1980s it was used by the UK music press to refer to a specific scene centered around the bands Pop Will Eat Itself and Crazyhead. The term never found favour with readers of 'the inkies' (Sounds, Melody Maker and the still extant NME) and was soon dropped. Now often used in predominantly working-class areas of the midlands and the north to mean someone who listens to rock-derived music and/or dresses in a manner that suggests they affiliate themselves with rock music of some kind.
Some grebo passed with Sabbath playing on his stereo.
The Poppies are at no. 17? God, a grebo band in the charts!
They're playing nu-metal now, bloody grebos!
grebo by cactuscat September 15, 2006
Word of the Day on August 24, 2026

TikTok Farlands

TikTok Farlands is a term to refer to videos that you see after scrolling for a long time. These videos can potentially be disturbing, or weird. Said videos can also have low likes, or low comments.
“I reached the TikTok Farlands bro
Word of the Day on August 23, 2026
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