clawsturbate

To masturbate with a claw or pincer.

Crabs, lobster, hermit crabs, Dr. Zoidberg, crayfish, war vets, and other pincered organisms can clawsturbate (and probably do).

The hermit crab began to clawsturbate when he was chosen as a new pet.

by MarcT October 14, 2009

Crapsturbate

Masturbate while taking a dump; Fapping and shitting at the same time.

The other day I was so horny that I decided to crapsturbate in the public bathroom.

by Anonymous Billybob Joe January 15, 2008

Crapsturbate

When you jack off to porn that involves, well, shit.

Ebby: 2 girls 1 cup always makes me crapsturbate.
Me: Well it always makes me throw up.

by Tikibarberfan July 12, 2010

chawsterbate

when you masturbate with a dip (chaw) in your lip.

Joe: "Hey guys, I was thinking of going spike hunting and sitting on the biggest one! Wanna join?"
Bob: "Yea! Sounds like a swell time. Anthony come hold hands with me and Joe while we sit on tons of spikes!"
Anthony: "Sounds enticing, but I think I'll hold down the fort and chawsterbate while you and Corynn are out of the room."

by meatpacker69 October 20, 2012

classturbator

(n.)- an individual who masturbates during class

classturbation -(v.)The act of feeling the sudden urge to masturbate purfusely during school hours. Usually the kid in the school that gets his ass kicked on a daily basis, yet still has the dignity to beat his meat the next day.

Billy: "Hey Mike!"
Mike: "What?"
Billy: "Scott Terry (from Boardman, Ohio) beat his meat in Wood Shop, Science and Math all in two school days!"
Mike: "Wow, what a perve, let's go beat his ass."
Billy: "Yeah, damn classturbator!"

by Del Marcos de toro May 18, 2008

Clapturbate

When you swing your penis up and down so it goes between your legs. When it goes between your legs it will reach between your ass cheeks and your ass cheeks will clench on your penis and you will pull it out rubbing along the taint eventually leading to ejaculation. Right before your penis gets clenched between your ass cheeks it makes a huge clap noise upon impact so you are essentially clapping your cheeks. This works best with shit stains in your ass cheeks, they work as a lubricant.

When ever I clapturbate my family hears me and complains they worry it will give me an STD.

by Scrotum Slayer May 19, 2018

crasturbate

to masturbate and cry at the same time. Usually performed by male graduate students in the sciences or engineering. Common causes include: no women around, ugliness, poverty, stress, being dumped, etc.

last night I thought of <name> so I crasturbated

by Bob Carlyle October 31, 2005