A cartcreel is like a cartwheel only there's a kick added to the end of it and often followed by a double backfist into a crowd of people at a hardcore show. It's a form of moshing made famous by the Creel brothers. Hated by some and feared by many, you know when a cartcreel is thrown, you better get the fuck out of the way.
by CycoLOTW July 10, 2012
Get the cartcreel mug.An elaborate sexual maneuver involving weeks of preparation and a large initial cost investment (should be avoided by all but the most committed and enthusiastic individuals). Supplies needed: octopus, gym membership, a fun-loving and adventure-seeking spirit, more lube than you've ever used in your life, an on-site surgeon (in case of disaster) and Grimm's Book of Fairy Tales.
Instructions:
1) become extremely fit as a member of your local gym or community center.
2) purchase a salt water tank and octopus-- preferably a Caribbean reef octopus for its lovely indigo hue, but the common Octopus vulgaris will do.
3) *ANIMAL CRUELTY INVOLVED IN THE FOLLOWING STEP* De-tentacle the octopus, and desert the body in the appropriate biohazard container of your choice. Preserve the tentacles in your salt water tank.
4) Read your partner, in the accent of your choice, the most fucked-up of Grimm's Fairy Tales. Excellent choices include Little Red Riding Hood and Hansel & Gretel.
4) For every murmur of horror they admit, slap your partner's genitalia with the tentacles.
5) Repeat until the fairy tales are complete or the tentacles no longer have any live neurons and cannot move on their own.
6) Afterwards, do cartwheels to air out one's vagina! THE VAGINA CARTWHEEL IS NOT COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS PROCESS.
THIS SEXUAL MANEUVER IS ILLEGAL IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES AND PUERTO RICO.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED*
(post-traumatic stress disorder a distinct possibility)
Instructions:
1) become extremely fit as a member of your local gym or community center.
2) purchase a salt water tank and octopus-- preferably a Caribbean reef octopus for its lovely indigo hue, but the common Octopus vulgaris will do.
3) *ANIMAL CRUELTY INVOLVED IN THE FOLLOWING STEP* De-tentacle the octopus, and desert the body in the appropriate biohazard container of your choice. Preserve the tentacles in your salt water tank.
4) Read your partner, in the accent of your choice, the most fucked-up of Grimm's Fairy Tales. Excellent choices include Little Red Riding Hood and Hansel & Gretel.
4) For every murmur of horror they admit, slap your partner's genitalia with the tentacles.
5) Repeat until the fairy tales are complete or the tentacles no longer have any live neurons and cannot move on their own.
6) Afterwards, do cartwheels to air out one's vagina! THE VAGINA CARTWHEEL IS NOT COMPLETE WITHOUT THIS PROCESS.
THIS SEXUAL MANEUVER IS ILLEGAL IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES AND PUERTO RICO.
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED*
(post-traumatic stress disorder a distinct possibility)
"My, what large teeth you have!" *gasp of horror* *slapping noise*
"Hey, I hear Henry F. is super-into Vagina Cartwheels!"
"Hey, I hear Henry F. is super-into Vagina Cartwheels!"
by the love pad November 12, 2012
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When you cartwheel past the entire Queen's Guard and then roll through the corridors of Buckingham Palace looking for the queen.
-A man got arrested outside of Buckingham Palace today.
-Really, how?
-He attempted the buckingham cartwheel.
-Really, how?
-He attempted the buckingham cartwheel.
by Uncle Naughty November 14, 2017
Get the buckingham cartwheel mug.A difficult high risk, well scoring sex move to really show a special lady you fuck well. Best performed on a couch in which the female is squashed in the corner inverted and the male performs dabbing motions straight down with her legs front and back to form an Egyptian boat.
Mate: " How was your night out with Dorothy lastnight"
Mate 2" Awesome, I fucked her all across the house and finished with an Egyptian cartwheel, she loved it"
Mate 2" Awesome, I fucked her all across the house and finished with an Egyptian cartwheel, she loved it"
by Ceeee February 23, 2015
Get the Egyptian Cartwheel mug.The act of the vagina inhaling air upon the initiation of a cartwheel and releasing it in the form of a queef upon completion. Such phenomenon is directly related to and a result of pelvic floor muscle palsy.
When Ruth does cartwheels, everyone thinks she’s farting when in fact she’s only cartwheel queefing.
by Kelly the Queef Chief April 4, 2019
Get the Cartwheel Queef mug.The act in which a group of five or more men stand in a straight line, insert their scrotums into the man in front of them, then proceed to do a synchronized cartwheel while still having anal.
Dude! I heard Johnny did a Caterpillar Cartwheel last night! They did five cartwheels before his dick snapped. Poor guy.
by Thechickenwing108 June 6, 2015
Get the Caterpillar Cartwheel mug.Caution: This is a very real extreme sport not to be taken lightly.
How to play: All you need, is the ability to preform a half-assed cartwheel, and a moderately busy street. Now the idea, is to cross the street while doing one simultaneous cartwheel. That means, no stopping, no slowing down, and no pussying out. Men who take pride in this activity are often drunk, or not men at all, but a bunch of dumb teenagers who are looking for a "good" time and a few laughs. Until they get hit by a car.
I, myself, like to wear some hiked up gym shorts with a cut off tshirt. Sunglasses are a must during the night. You can't see a thing when cars put their brights on. Clothing of all kinds is acceptable, but try to make it sexy.
There are many types of games you can play besides the regular 'cross the street for fun' deal. Here's a few more games you can try playing:
Pig: You need at least 2 people to play this. One man must cartwheel across the street, in any path, and the other play must copy his exact path. If any car honks at you, gives you the finger, or yells at you, you are disqualified. Bitch.
Freestyle: Just cartwheel all over the road, go with and against traffic, just break free with an explosion of cartwheel greatness. If you want to compete, you set the amount of time each person has to make a performance, and rate it afterwords. The man with the highest score (preferably out of 10) wins.
Tag: The same as regular tag, but you have to stay in the lanes, and can only travel by cartwheeling. If you leave the lanes, your automatically ''it''.
Don't let these games limit your imagination. Come up with your own game!
Have fun playing in traffic!
How to play: All you need, is the ability to preform a half-assed cartwheel, and a moderately busy street. Now the idea, is to cross the street while doing one simultaneous cartwheel. That means, no stopping, no slowing down, and no pussying out. Men who take pride in this activity are often drunk, or not men at all, but a bunch of dumb teenagers who are looking for a "good" time and a few laughs. Until they get hit by a car.
I, myself, like to wear some hiked up gym shorts with a cut off tshirt. Sunglasses are a must during the night. You can't see a thing when cars put their brights on. Clothing of all kinds is acceptable, but try to make it sexy.
There are many types of games you can play besides the regular 'cross the street for fun' deal. Here's a few more games you can try playing:
Pig: You need at least 2 people to play this. One man must cartwheel across the street, in any path, and the other play must copy his exact path. If any car honks at you, gives you the finger, or yells at you, you are disqualified. Bitch.
Freestyle: Just cartwheel all over the road, go with and against traffic, just break free with an explosion of cartwheel greatness. If you want to compete, you set the amount of time each person has to make a performance, and rate it afterwords. The man with the highest score (preferably out of 10) wins.
Tag: The same as regular tag, but you have to stay in the lanes, and can only travel by cartwheeling. If you leave the lanes, your automatically ''it''.
Don't let these games limit your imagination. Come up with your own game!
Have fun playing in traffic!
One time, a cop stopped me while I was Extreme Cartwheeling, only to tell me I was weraing too dark clothing for the nighttime, and that I should be careful.
See? Outlaws respect a man who can cartwheel.
See? Outlaws respect a man who can cartwheel.
by Brttrx December 14, 2008
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