assault and beat-ery

The act of secretly tricking another person into swallowing your seman.

Cindy: "Oh! This chocolate mousse is delicious, Dave! How do you make it"
Debra: "Yeah, Dave, what is your secret?"
Dave; "Oh, I'll show you guys sometime!" (Aside: "Right after I jack a couple fresh loads, you little bimbos!)"

Kirby: "Hey Mike, have you committed assault and beat-ery?"
Mike: "Oh yeah."
Kirby: "Really? When?!"
Mike: "How's that ham and swiss with mayo treating ya?"
Kirby: (Spiting) "You sick fuck!!"

by Billy Beck O'Hannity April 4, 2010