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alphabesize 

to use actions (threatening physical harm, winks, finger-to-the-lips- shusshing) or words (cussing, screaming, or board-room posturing) to diminutize or dominate someone into beta status and/or elevate someone else above them to alpha status
I had a huge argument with my father yesterday over something as stoobid as my washing his car: he totally didn't care about how clean the car was...so much as he cared about wanting to alphabesize me over the fact that he owned the car and I didn't...no matter how shiny I polished it.
alphabesize by deal April 26, 2006
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Alphabecide 

The act of murdering your opponent in a word duel or game such as words with friends, scrabble, or boggle.
Kent-i challenge you to a game of words with friends
Kat-ok, but you should know I'm gonna alphabecide you and they'll never find the body!
Kent-why you always talking shit when you know my vocab be legit?!
Alphabecide by dark korner October 3, 2016

Alphabetized 

when a sexual minority identity-politiker tries to get you banned for being straight
"YOU CAN'T JUST SAY YOU TREAT WOMEN YOU DON'T WANT TO FUCK LIKE MEN, THAT'S TRIGGERING AND HOMOPHOBIC; PREPARE TO BE ALPHABETIZED STRAIGHT-DEMON"

alphabetize 

A made-up Americanism invented to describe the process of reordering a list of items into alphabetical order.
Ahm gonna alphabetize these here Krispy Kremes so's ah can eat them in gahd-damned ordah!
alphabetize by Flamingo Swavey August 18, 2003

alphabitize 

the art of trying to spell or make a shape of something with cereal and milk in a bowl. Usually results in failure and consumption.
Mikey: Dude, check it out. I alphabitized something.
Davey: You lie, fool. Let me see.
Mikey: Go ahead.
Davey: Those are Cheerios, idiot.
Mikey: Shaped like your mom's vagina after last night!
alphabitize by cork1357 July 6, 2008

alphabetized 

When you organize something alphabetically
I alphabetized my entire comic collection
alphabetized by Alphabetized October 30, 2015

Alphabetize

(V.) To become an alpha male (esp. for a beta male).

Alphabetizing: Events or circumstances that facilitate the transition from beta to alpha.
The budding chad finally realized that being a simp was a dead end and decided to alphabetize. He is now at the top of the sexual marketplace. The girls he once pedestalized now call him King Daddy.
Alphabetize by Slang-Slanga May 3, 2026