Yehudiva 

A Yehudiva is someone, usually of the female gender, who is self centered, loud, petty, appearance oriented, and is either closely tied to Jewish people, or is Jewish by religious choice, ethnicity or background.

Common traits of Yehudiva include loud personalities, such as; a Brooklyn accent, a raspy overworked voice, or a very noticeable Yiddish flare in their speech. They are also prone to wearing very colorful makeup, such as cyan or black eye makeup, and very bold red or hot pink lipstick. Yehudivas are also prone to extreme infatuation towards babies and small dogs.

Yehudivas are also less than comprehensive of technology, they may not know how to use technology very well such as the internet or their cell phones. They are also so loud they often have trouble hearing their surroundings, and as such, their cell phones usually have very loud, unique sounding notifications in order to hear if they have notifications. e.g. a 120dB train sound with an SOS vibration pattern and light show to signal an email.

Yehudiva is a portmanteau of the Hebrew/Semetic word "Yehudi" Meaning a Jew, and the English word, "Diva" meaning someone who is self interested and thinks they are the centre of the universe.

I was volunteering at a community centre and I had to assist this Yehudiva for two hours! She wouldn't stop talking about her kids!

Yehudiva by sciencebang June 16, 2016

yehudianity 

like christianity vs catholicism,
Yehudianity (vs yehudism) is a laidback conglomeration of jewish practices, with a smattering of other peoples traditions, like chistmas, thrown in for fun.

Basicaly a feel-good version of yehudism similar to reform, but more true to jewish principles (like not getting tattoos, resting on the 7th day, kashrut, literacy and a knowledge of history, sunday school, torah of some sort, and all the cool jewish holidays...)

"dude, wtf's your religon?!"

mumbled reply:
"Yehudianity"

or

"wow, those yehudians sure are cool! I'm gonna setup a trust fund promoting their cause. Yeah!"

yehudianity by random guy 007 October 26, 2006