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Valentard 

Someone (usually a guy) that is very attractive, in a rock-star sort of way. (Tall and skinny.) Usually plays an instrument of some sort and has piercings and tattoos. (They have no meaning; just because (s)he wanted one.) Tells Bill Brasky jokes after consuming one beer (Also very drunk at this point). Has a redneck hick sort of manner. Ususally clad in a baseball hat and mismatched flip-flops and cargo shorts. Very self-confident. Very horny, but also very stupid. Passes up sex with two very willing wo(men) on several occasions. Just a general prick all the way around.
Dry and sarcastic, you will learn everything you ever need to know in college from him/her.
Valentard: So, this one time I was in the back of a truck will Bill Brasky and a deer-

Girl: So, you wanna get out of here?

Valentard: Sure.....So you see this tattoo here. I just went in and said I wanted a tattoo.

Girl: Cool!

Valentard: So I play piano.

Girl: Even cooler! Good with your fingers, then, eh?

Valentard: So, I don't want a relationship out of this, I just wanna fuck.

Girl: Great! That's all I really want too! Can my friend (insert name here) come too?

Valentard: Sure!.....So, I totally don't have any condoms. Maybe some other time?

Girls: (Very pissed) Sure.
Valentard by Brittany Allen December 24, 2008
Related Words

voluntard 

A voluntard provides unpaid help, generally in the form of time and or labor to a non-profit or charity organization, but his or her actions or effort demonstrate a lack of concientousness, care, or common sense. Voluntards may repeatedly commit acts that would cause them to be counseled or fired from a paying job.
The voluntards at the pet rescue rarely take the time to remove uneaten food from the bowls before putting the bowls in the sink, thus causing frequent plumbing issues that require time or money to rectify.
voluntard by GovTeach July 12, 2015

Valentanal

My wife said that she wants valentanal instead of flowers.
Valentanal by Chucktastic68 February 13, 2021

Voluntard 

A volunteer that is retarded. Usually too dedicated to the cause to have a functioning brain, making it hard for everyone else around them.
I know we have to work with them but dude, these voluntards are killing us!
Voluntard by Firstee January 26, 2009
someone who has an inordinate amount of trouble scheduling, accepting and attending meetings (especially through Outlook)
"Sorry I'm such a calentard -- I swear that meeting fell off of my calendar. Again. Can you forward it to me?"
calentard by kdubs94304 October 7, 2009
Often refers to one who lacks total and utter common sense.
Dude, that valtard just lit his pubes on fire trying to light his cigarette.
Valtard by Drop Dead, Gorgeous April 15, 2008
More from Urban Dictionary

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
Literally "dirty" pronounced with a West Indian accent. Can also have a positive connotation, for example Sean Paul's album title "Dutty Rock".
"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
Word of the Day on October 1, 2026
korean word for madam, older woman
Ajumma wait a moment
Ajumma by aintnotinbutnice July 5, 2009
Word of the Day on September 30, 2026

Slop Grenade

When someone uses AI to generate a large document, slide deck, or piece of code/software and tosses it over the fence for you to deal with.
Chad: Hey Brent I sent you the new backend API change to review, it’s only 100 files changed.

Brent: he just tossed me a slop grenade
Slop Grenade by Joe Squid September 28, 2026
Word of the Day on September 29, 2026
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).
After we broke up, he was floxi to me.
floxi by Dr. Geek May 13, 2009
Word of the Day on September 28, 2026
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