Turtlesneeze 

When you go in for a slow kiss but accidentally sneeze in the person's face.

I waited forever for him to kiss me but it ended up being a turtlesneeze.

Turtlesneeze by popomonkey23 March 16, 2015

turtle sneeze 

A turtle kiss gone wrong; when you stradle over someones face and try to give them a turtle kiss, instead sharting all over their face.

That turtle kiss was bad enough, but it ended up turning into a turtle sneeze.

turtle sneeze by Alen Shravi January 18, 2010