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Textament

textament

The last text that's sent from your phone by your loved ones so people know you're dead and not to text you anymore
Textament

Before I die I have to make sure I write a will and the text I want my loved ones to send when I'm dead it's my last will and Textament
by Ms012469 November 18, 2016
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Textament

The way people are supposed to text. So instead of oh my god its omg
wow, following the textament makes you text fast!
by Mason Manson December 9, 2008
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Textagenic

It’s a word used to describe someone’s texting habits . If a person sucks at texting, like they don’t reply after hours or the following day, they’re NOT Textagenic Bad Texter. However, they ARE Textagenic if hey reply almost instantly Good Texter
Matt sucks at texting, I guess he’s just not textagenic.
by Kenvee Lim October 31, 2019
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Testyment

Ayy, You Heard About That Dude Testyment?, He Hits Mad Clips!
by Sipaj December 2, 2018
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testament

The most underrated thrash band of the 80's. Any true metalhead knows how much ass this band demolishes.

Still rocking faces off to this day. Long live Testament.
by aldwardo July 29, 2006
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Testament

Testament's eighties stuff makes my neck sore.
by TallicaD00dX August 13, 2004
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Testament

The greatest thrash metal band to never get famous. Holy shit they deserved it though.
Formed in 1983 in the Bay Area, right as thrash was getting off the ground, Testament (one of my favorite band names, too) finalized their lineup of Chuck Billy as singer Alex Skolnick on lead guitar, Eric Peterson on rhythm, Greg Christian on bass, and Paul Bostaph on drums.

Testament released a demo in '86, and then The Legacy in 1987, which was actually really good, even though it didn't hit mainstream because rock nowadays is for PUSSIES! GOD DAMN IT, WHY DON'T PEOPLE LIKE METAL?! THEY ACTUALLY HAVE TALENT, AND FUCKING NICKLEBACK RELEASED THE SAME FUCKING SONG, OVER AND OVER AGAIN, BITCHING ABOUT LOVE AND ALL THAT BULLSHIT, JUST RENAMING IT CONSTANTLY! FUCK POPULARITY, TESTAMENT SHOULD BE IN THE BIG FIVE OF THRASH! I'M AWARE THERE'S ONLY FOUR (Metallica, Megadeth, Anthrax, Slayer) BUT THERE SHOULD BE FIVE, GOD DAMMIT!

Ahem. Excuse me. Anyways, they followed up the Legacy with the New Order, which kind of got people noticing that these badasses are really fucking good. In 1989 and 1990, they released Practice What You Preach and Souls of Black, two of my favorite albums of theirs. PWYP moved away from the weird, Black Sabbathy lyrics and into the more political side of metal (hence the name and title track). Souls of Black was a little less thrash metal, though they did find other ways to kick ass on the album, though once again, the title track is awesome.

Following Souls of Black, Testament got screwed over by grunge, lost Michael Skolnick, did God knows what because Michael Skolnick left, and released a few crappier albums, trying to go more mainstream.

In 2001, Chuck, one of the two guys of Testament to actually play the entire time since its inception, was diagnosed with cancer, so all shit stopped, thank God. If they released another album like First Strike is Deadly, I'd've shit a chicken and jumped off a bridge. And not necessarily in that order.

Anyways, Chuck's fine, and good enough to record with... (gasp) Alex Skolnick? I thought you were in that Trans-Russia... something... Anyways, they recorded the Formation of Damnation, my third favorite album, and by far their best since the late 80's.

TESTAMENT IS BACK, MOTHERFUCKERS! HELL YEAH!
Fucking poser who likes Enter Sandman, so therefore thinks Metallica is the best shit since smack, and they work as album reviewer in Rolling Stone: "ENTER SANDMAN!!!"
Actual metalhead who knows what the fuck good music is:
"Yeah, it's OK."
Fucking poser: "NO IT FUCKING ROOLZ! METALLICA! BLACK ALBUM!!!"
Metalhead- "No, not really. It shows how much Metallica doesn't care about their music, and how greedy they are, because in the eighties, when nobody knew them, they just played for the hell of it, and released four of the greatest albums ever to come out of the metal genre. But, then, in 1991, they decided to sell out, just to make a few more dollars, and release the Black Album, which is a testament (yes, that was on purpose) to how they don't care about their thrash fanbase, which has more heart in it than all the little pussies like you who think they like metal but it's really just shit.
Testament didn't sell out, they just tried to change their style following the departure of some of the greatest musicians the world has ever known. They don't care about money, or fame, or anything. They play good music, and that's all that matters.
Fucking Poser: ...
(Fucking Poser's head explodes from the amount of knowledge just inserted into his fucktard little head).
by xxCFHxx July 6, 2009
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