Telephonians

The chipmunk-like creatures that live in the telephone wires and transfer the words from one receiver to the other. The "Static" as people call it, is the low hiss as a result of the Telephonians getting upset. Telephonians are not commonly recognized by others, as the government fears that PETA would try to intervene in the telephone system by calling this display of teamwork "Animal Abuse." Telephonians are believed to be direct descendents from Jesus, as they seem to have eternal life. No dead Telephonian has ever been sighted.

"Hey Jesus, say hi to the telephonians for me!"

Telephonians by JesusApprentice September 21, 2011

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telephonitis

A common disorder precipitated by the overconsumption of alcohol causing the hammered sufferer to reach out by phone to every last person in their telephone contact list.

In a state of tragic undeniable pathos, a bad case of telephonitis drove her to make attempt after attempt to communicate absolutely nothing of importance with seriously shitfaced unintelligible slurring and an endless flood of tears!

telephonitis by Dr Bunnygirl October 29, 2020