Sustache

A swath of facial hair grown to ward off enemies and, consequently, any potential mates;

When a mustache is unavoidably suspicious & disconcerting.
"Is it just me or was that UPS guy giving off some kill-you-in-blue-lipstick vibes?"
"Don't overthink it -- he's just sporting a major sustache."

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"I almost had her number," Stuart thought to himself.

He didn't realize his sustache was ensuring his worst fear of dying alone.
by Menorah January 08, 2015
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