Stephen Kelly

The only man on planet earth who contains the power to drag a teacher down the hall by her hair and is able to do so by claiming he is, "Retarded". This man absolutely loves the smell of farts, especially his own. He is known to trap his rancid farts in his XXL shirt and sniff it all up. (Not one bit of that gas goes to waste) He is also known to fart and blame it on other people. His way of blaming it on other people is the classic, "*point* It was him" method. Many have caught on to his antics and know that he is lying but still respect him for who he is.

Situation 1:
Teacher: Stephen who are you pointing at?
Stephen: He farted it wasn't me I swear.
Teacher: Okay, please sit down.

Situation 2:
Student 1: Hey did you hear about that kid Stephen Kelly?
Student 2: Yeah I did, he is awesome I am a fan!
Student 1: I am a bigger fan I follow him on Twitter #StephenKellyFan

by iHateWindstream March 5, 2018

The Stephen Kelly

Pulling a Stephen Kelly is not easy. Whether it be trapping that impressive fart you've been saving all day in your shirt, or farting out loud and blaming it on the poor person next to you, or even dragging a poor teacher down the hallway by her hair, it takes a special person such as Stephen himself to pull it off. You just have to claim that you are slow in the head and everything will settle in.

Stephen: *fart*
Teacher: Who farted? That was so rude!
Stephen: *Pointing rapidly at the person next to him*
Teacher: You just pulled The Stephen Kelly you sneaky bastard!

Stephen: *Drags the teacher down the hall by her hair*
Class: What the hell is going on?
Student 1: Oh my lord, he is going to get expelled.
Student 2: No he won't he is slow in the head.

by iHateWindstream March 6, 2018