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A turd that explodes from your arse with the consistency of sloppy mashed potato... Only brown. Ofter occurs as part of an After Grog Bog (AGB)
Hey Dougie, you should have seen the Splattercakes that I just left in your toilet bowl.
by Flatus McTurd'o'head August 06, 2009
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When a rogue squirt of jizz lands in your underwear, leaving you with an uncomfortable sticky sensation that can only be made worse by the presence of pubic hair.
Jim: "My mum almost walked in on me choking the goose the other day"
Gary: "Did she see anything?"
Jim: "Thankfully not. But the splatter cake was the size of a baseball"
via giphy
by mylittlewhiteslug October 23, 2018
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