Skip to main content

Southside Surprise 

After taking a dump you realize that you need a deeper cleaning than normal. You layer up the tissue, insert it in to your anus, and push gainfully as to ensure adequate penetration depth. Unfortunately you pushed a little too hard and that cheap toilet paper that they stock in the bathrooms at the office is not capable of withstanding the finger pressure.

Your reaction time is not nearly quick enough. Your eager finger slips right through the gaping tissue hole in to your anus which you have purposely relaxed so as to allow for proper penetration. Your anus is not so relaxed any more and you instinctively tighten the muscles, producing a firm, albeit temporary hold on your finger.

You then hastily yank your finger out of your rectum causing slight discomfort as the small, twisted pieces of cheap tissue have caused immediate, itchy irritation due to their scrubbing your anal wall.

You muster the will to look at your finger. There is no time to become curious as to whether or not it will smell because you realize quickly that it does, partly because you wafted your finger to the frontal area where your senses are most responsive and partly because fresh, moist, shit that is not submerged in water creates a powerful odor indeed.

Finally, you require several rotations of hand-washing with soap to completely rid of the stench that has penetrated the oils contained on your finger.

This my friends is the Southside Surprise.
AGAIN? I thought they upgraded the toilet paper! Southside Surprise strikes again.
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.
More from Urban Dictionary

Respectfully 

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020
Word of the Day on September 26, 2026

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.
"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."
Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020
Word of the Day on September 21, 2026
Next