Sewanee Dog

A Sewanee Dog (canus lupus dumpiarus) is a species commonly found at Sewanee: The University of the South, a small liberal arts university in Tennesse. Oddly enough, the species is entirely female. Although this species is specific to Sewanee, it probably exists at other affluent, southern universities under a different nomenclature.

The Sewanee Dog is typically spotted in the Fall and Winter months wearing designer jeans, a Northface fleece and uggs. Other variations may include leggings -- often almost see-through -- with a flanel shirt or the addition of a Barbour jacket. Sewanee Dogs sporting tightly fitting sweatpants and a prep-school hoody have been spotted, but are less common.

The Sewanee Dogs are especially fond of cigarettes, and will spend hours on end at the library just so they can take cig breaks. In fact, the average Sewanee Dog spends more time smoking than they do studying, but see no irony in complaining about how much work they have. They also enjoy boasting about the number of "all nighters" they have pulled in a week, and don't see any flaw in this study habit.

They seem unaware of their sexually repulsive nature and see nothing wrong with reaking of Parliament Lights and sporting a hacking cough.

Their diet consists mostly of Adderall and Red Bull, but can be suplimented by greasy pub food and diet coke.

Male Student #1: Buzz's girlfriend, woof!

MS #2: That's a Sewanee Dog.

Sewanee Dog by Sewanee Zoologist Society December 13, 2009