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American millennial male no older than 27 that waxes about only drinking scotch; prefers to be an annoyingly random fan of an English premier league despite no cultural or geographic ties to England.. To the point of making certain to ask about the NFL or baseball so as to remark they don't follow football or baseball but instead are rabid Swansea or Crystal Palace fans; who also wear shirts that are too small and never use the phrase "I think" but instead use "I feel" so everything they speak about can be held by them to be as they say it is because it is not a declaration of fact but a passive aggressive display of their personal reality.
me: what a game last night

Jason: yeah? I was watching a little, NFL right? It's NFL?

Me: yeah..
Jason: I don't follow football. Well. American football.

Me: yah?
Jason: I watch EPL.

Me: Emerson. Palmer. Lake? It's ELP
Jason: no! Haw haw. Premy-are League.

Me: soccer? Why?
Jason: always preferred soccer on tv. Americans mostly don't get soccer.

Me: you're from Binghamton NY.

Jason: yeah. We were at the batch whisky bar that opened and I noted the Jets of NY don't seem to like the Patriots.

Me: dude. You're a pompadouche
by paul z ated July 04, 2016
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