Paulspeak 

A language invented by Paulo Embry

Here's a sample
Jungily Gym----Jungle Gym
Stick with the prongs-----Forks
Stick with a bowl-----Spoons
Ice Lolly------popsicle
Warm fuzzy-------wolf coat
Chompy chompy------tooth
Sammay-----Sam, Paul's cult leader
Somethin' somethin'-----sex
Oil Cittay-------Oil City, Paul's hometown now
naughty-----slutty
Lee-Lee-------Leah, Paul's only "female" friend
Archay---Archie Click, Paul's halfway-straight friend
Chitty chitty-----shapeshifting
one piece suit------human form
QHRS----where Paul graduated his senoir year of Eighth Grade

Paul: "Now, me and Archay are gonna chitty-chitty into our warm fuzzies in Oil Cittay."
Phil: "You me you and Archie are going to shape shift into wolves in Oil City?"

Paul: "Please pass the stick with the prongs."
Sam: "You mean forks?"
Paul: "No, stick with the prongy-prongies."
Sam: "It's forks."
Paul: "No, it's stick with the prongy-prongies."
Sam: "Paul....it's forks."
Paul: "STICK WITH THE------"
Archie: "It's no use when he's using Paulspeak."

Paulspeak by Tahsois July 17, 2010

paulsplaining 

The act of overriding another's experience and knowledge brought on by your ability to conjure the power of 1,000 vaginas and Mother Teresa herself.

I was trying to describe how bad my period felt but then dumbfuck Jerry paulsplained, saying I shouldn't feel any pain because periods are just papercuts that take a while to clot.

I wanted to get the HPV vaccine, but my dickhole dad paulsplained that it wasn't necessary and I'd get autism if I got it anyhow.

I was talking to my friend at work, Sarah, about how prevalent rape is and our colleague, Terry the Terrible, came over and did some paulsplaining. He said we should just dress more appropriately or start carrying a gun if we didn't want to be raped.

paulsplaining by melinoff March 28, 2019

pavspeak 

Drunk text messages with horrid spelling or wrongly selected predictive text words.

The whole message was in Pavspeak.

pavspeak by wordqween37 September 17, 2018

Paulsplaining 

The art of condescending when explaining something trival to someone while simultaneously making it up due to a complete lack of knowledge on the subject. Paulsplaining is the art of dogmaticly sticking to a point of view in spite of apposing aguements which seem to be correct.

No chance of getting your point across this fucker is paulsplaining, you might as well go and debate the wind.

Paulsplaining by Peter Peter the Pipe Eater June 8, 2025