middle-aged friend 1: So there were these chicks at the club last night wearing next to nothing and they must have been like 19 or 20... (coughing fit.)
middle-aged friend 2: Whoa! Nice Nabocough man, they must have been pretty young and hot. Can I get you some water or a lozenge?
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.