A John P is the type of friend to stay back when his friend ties they're shoe, most importantly, only a John P would be able to kill someone with his Monster Dong - The type of guy that wouldn't brag about it too much either.

John P is the funny guy in the group, his sense of humour could almost make anyone happier.
"oh look, there's John P!" "What a dumbass isn't he" "yeah but he's funny as hell!"
by Ashley knode May 28, 2020
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John P thinks he's hot shit because he works at a warehouse for Home Depot and there's mad bitches there. There's this bitch that has dyed hair, a septum ring and John P simps over her but knows deep inside that he will never receive the cooch. He smokes weed, trips on acid and plays league of legends all fucking day, jerking off and just turning his brain to mush. He used to play guitar but now he doesn't play shit and is just an unproductive sack of shit that sits on his ass all day. His laugh sounds like a donkey and he lives with Jesus.
Person1: Yo, who's that guy?
Person2: Oh, that guy? That's John P.
Person1: Hm, he looks like he simps for bitches, never breaks up with his girlfriend, sits on his ass and plays league all fucking day, and jerks off every waking second.
Person2: Yep, that's him. Classic John P.
by badussy2.0 February 10, 2022
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